About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.
zingline89's FML badges
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
zingline89's favorite FMLs
by dudeyouarefired / 12/20/2012 at 3:16am / Miscellaneous
by James / 12/17/2012 at 9:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 7:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
by teejayrn / 12/15/2012 at 6:48am / United States (North Carolina) / Transportation
Today, I avoided having to wash the dishes by faking a cold. My sucker of a wife believed me and hopped off my balls about it. Later on, after I made a miraculous recovery, she told me to take out the trash. It's freezing outside and raining, and I feel a very real cold coming on. FML
by fuckmyassimcold / 12/14/2012 at 2:19pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a cruise. I gave my bags to a porter, and tipped him $5. Later that night, my bags still hadn't arrived at my room, and that's when I realized that I'd paid a fake porter to steal my bags. FML
by McFizzy321 / 12/12/2012 at 10:43pm / United States (Florida) / Holidays
Today, my boyfriend was dropping me off home and we were still in the car. When I went in to give him a hug, my hand hit his shoulder and I dropped my phone at his feet. Just as I pulled back up with it, my dad was staring at us from outside. He still appears to think I was giving him head. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 2:20am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML
by KennyDidIt / 12/09/2012 at 8:18am / United States (Alabama) / Animals
Today, my dad got a warning from our ISP for going well over their fair usage limit. I barely use our wifi, and I keep telling him he should password-protect our router to stop people leeching our Internet. He's blaming me anyway, and says I'm grounded until January. FML
by WPA2 OR DEATH / 12/07/2012 at 4:49pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by JessThompson / 12/05/2012 at 11:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML
by Anonymous / 12/05/2012 at 6:27am / Israel / Kids
by Anonymous / 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm / United States (New York) / Geek
by whitecollar / 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm / United Kingdom (York) / Work
by Likian5 / 12/04/2012 at 8:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Banana / 12/04/2012 at 11:04am / Puerto Rico / Transportation