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zingline89

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zingline89
  • Town/Country : Wisconsin, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 July 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 3254
  • Number of comments : 441
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.

zingline89's last visitors

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zingline89's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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zingline89's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

#20454623
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19023) - you deserved it (33636)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nean83 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, one of my paintings was accepted into a local art gallery. It would've been a dream come true, had my "best friend" not submitted it under her own name and taken all the credit. FML

#20453750
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32740) - you deserved it (1939)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was asked out by a friend of mine. He's a doctor and works at a prestigious hospital, so thinking we would eat somewhere special, I got all dressed up. We ended up eating at his hospital's cafeteria, because he gets a small employee discount. FML

#20453732
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30157) - you deserved it (6789)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:37pm - love - by wowthanks (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was running on the treadmill at my local gym when I saw a girl I like a lot. I called out to her to say hi. As she was coming over, I accidentally stepped on the belt with one foot, crashed down on the treadmill, and continued to slide down in front of her, emerging with a gashed knee and arm. FML

#20445461
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20077) - you deserved it (3592)

On 01/06/2013 at 10:16pm - love - by Dkim620 (man) - United States

Today, my fiancé decided he wants a baby only because our dog is good, quiet, and falls asleep as soon as he starts to cradle her. He thinks a baby will be just like that. FML

#20445378
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20742) - you deserved it (2214)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:49pm - animals - by Twiggysucks68 (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I visited my grandparents' house. While getting a drink from the fridge, I noticed the Christmas card my family sent them had my face scratched out. When I confronted them about it, they said it was the cat. They don't have a cat. FML

#20445318
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17871) - you deserved it (1149)

On 01/06/2013 at 7:50pm - misc - by HatedGrandson - United States

Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML

#20442876
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17111) - you deserved it (3454)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:31pm - love - by marisa (woman) - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML

#20437963
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27313) - you deserved it (9112)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36379) - you deserved it (4348)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML

#20412922
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20996) - you deserved it (7500)

On 12/22/2012 at 1:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I found out that the tinsel on my Christmas tree is worth a couple of hundred euros per strand. Well, that's how much the two that were surgically removed from my cat have cost me. At least the cat's going to be fine. FML

#20410843
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16176) - you deserved it (11896)

On 12/21/2012 at 5:02am - animals - by I Like My Cat (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27916) - you deserved it (6015)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was sleeping on an airplane. I dreamed that I was running my hands up and down my friend's leg sexually to creep him out. I woke up and I realized that I was running my hand up and down the leg of the old man sitting next to me. FML

#20408734
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35239) - you deserved it (22027)

On 12/20/2012 at 9:49am - intimacy - by joyness (woman) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML

#20408486
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32099) - you deserved it (3320)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today, my neighbor installed a large radio that loudly plays Christmas music 24/7. When I called in a complaint to the police department they told me to, "get in the Christmas spirit." FML

#20404496
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (7981)

On 12/17/2012 at 9:28pm - misc - by James (man) - United States



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