Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

zingline89

Offline (the 06/02/2014 at 3:18am) | Search for a member

zingline89

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 July 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3714
  • Number of comments : 444
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.

zingline89's page activity

Visits<b>berryjones11024</b> - 12 hours ago<b>vividpictures</b> - 13 hours ago<b>GlasgowSneer</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 5:13pm<b>onanknovotna</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 12:05pm<b>FrancesShiver</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:47am<b>dabears1011234</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 8:21pm<b>Kor14</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:43am<b>lotr4</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:30pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:20pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:09pm<b>ihpp</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:52am<b>garage</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 6:50pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:15am<b>mysadlyfe</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:29pm<b>qdawg06</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:54pm<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:21pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 9:38pm<b>Saub</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:39am

Liked!<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 4:18pm

zingline89's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of zingline89's badges

zingline89's favorite FMLs

Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML

#17862319
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25757) - you deserved it (1997)

On 09/29/2011 at 8:27am - misc - by btchzloveit (man) - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)

Today, my mom tried to diagnose my sickness with advice she'd gotten from a dog magazine. FML

#17848312
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22910) - you deserved it (1970)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:25pm - health - by fml - United States

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

#17843188
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16489) - you deserved it (27117)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:03pm - health - by Jesus (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML

#17839150
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30992) - you deserved it (15076)

On 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Yuuucky (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36883) - you deserved it (6951)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

#1714855
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26836) - you deserved it (95546)

On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Freaks's Illustrated FML
  • What's going on? Something weird is going on. I can feel it in my bones. Can't you? People are acting weird, as if they're short-fused all of a sudden. There's definitely…

Friday 1 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: