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zingline89

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zingline89
  • Town/Country : Wisconsin, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 July 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 3206
  • Number of comments : 441
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.

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zingline89's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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zingline89's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to an eviction notice after an apartment inspection. The reason? Having an unauthorized pet that could cause unnecessary damage to my suite. My pet is a goldfish. FML

#19223873
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22941) - you deserved it (2259)

On 03/05/2012 at 9:47pm - animals - by goldfish - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23688) - you deserved it (7493)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, my friend and I walked 3 miles to a Starbucks. We went inside, paid for our coffees and walked the 3 miles back to my house. We forgot to pick up our coffees. FML

#19216079
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7843) - you deserved it (40199)

On 03/04/2012 at 7:27pm - money - by stuff2710 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML

#19204484
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7524) - you deserved it (25874)

On 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by argh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got myself an organ donor card, just to feel wanted. FML

#19190899
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17556) - you deserved it (4471)

On 02/29/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Vandrefalk - Norway

Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML

#19182988
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8229) - you deserved it (28220)

On 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm - misc - by kal - United States (New York)

Today, someone caused over $400 worth of damage by breaking into my car, just to steal $8 worth of beer. FML

#19182487
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24144) - you deserved it (2593)

On 02/28/2012 at 2:41pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I get to stand in the unemployment line for the second time in a year because my company can't pay me. My parents own the company. FML

#19181051
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24957) - you deserved it (2533)

On 02/28/2012 at 8:27am - work - by Jaxur05 - United States

Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML

#19180967
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25181) - you deserved it (1976)

On 02/28/2012 at 7:46am - animals - by JeffeeBojangles - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML

#19173596
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20853) - you deserved it (3083)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I picked up a warm blanket that just came out of the dryer. Despite wearing pants, the static electricity from the blanket delivered a shock straight to my crotch. FML

#19146021
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19314) - you deserved it (3511)

On 02/23/2012 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was writing my rough draft of an essay, and I forgot how to spell a word. I waited for auto correct to help. I was writing on paper. FML

#19144925
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10441) - you deserved it (38083)

On 02/23/2012 at 8:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML

#19142654
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26355) - you deserved it (1985)

On 02/22/2012 at 10:49pm - kids - by crzyry (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, in a rush to get ready, I put on some "sexy" panties that I bought years ago. By the second hour of work, they were so tight and uncomfortable, I had to cut slits up the sides to avoid cutting off the circulation to my legs. FML

#19083998
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13623) - you deserved it (10313)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:26am - health - by too tight (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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