About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25796) - you deserved it (1953)
On 02/22/2012 at 10:49pm - kids - by crzyry (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, in a rush to get ready, I put on some "sexy" panties that I bought years ago. By the second hour of work, they were so tight and uncomfortable, I had to cut slits up the sides to avoid cutting off the circulation to my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13170) - you deserved it (10171)
On 02/15/2012 at 6:26am - health - by too tight (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, while I was at work, my boyfriend decided to give my Cocker Spaniel a haircut. I now have the equivalent of an over-sized naked mole rat running around my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14916) - you deserved it (1763)
On 02/15/2012 at 6:09am - animals - by workaholic (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to shit out a second story window is a very bad idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4164) - you deserved it (24699)
On 02/13/2012 at 9:55pm - misc - by michael (man) - United States
Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19238) - you deserved it (3036)
On 02/11/2012 at 5:19am - animals - by lulu - United States (Ohio)
Today, I received a parking fine for $147. My car isn't even worth that much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16648) - you deserved it (5046)
Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18336) - you deserved it (2149)
On 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17594) - you deserved it (1252)
On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, while waiting outside a liquor store for my boyfriend, a drunk guy leaned over my shoulder, took a large bite out of my burger, and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22401) - you deserved it (2863)
On 01/26/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by RequilaRainbow - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23011) - you deserved it (2300)
On 01/12/2012 at 7:59pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31625) - you deserved it (3752) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my boyfriend texted me and said I had forgotten my blue bra. I don't have any blue bras. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34928) - you deserved it (2708)
On 12/17/2011 at 8:17am - love - by fmll - Norway (Hordaland)
Today, I turned 21. It's also the day I learned how it feels to have my foot and leg set on fire by a drunken idiot who thought it was a great idea to splash lighter fluid into an open-pit bonfire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18040) - you deserved it (1627)
On 12/01/2011 at 2:00am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, at the point of orgasm, my boyfriend screamed out, "Is this all there is?!" then rolled over and stared blankly at the ceiling without speaking for ages. This happens a lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29261) - you deserved it (4953)
On 11/24/2011 at 8:57am - intimacy - by Jane (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27825) - you deserved it (4478)
On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)
Monday 17 June 2013
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