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zingline89

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zingline89
  • Town/Country : Wisconsin, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 July 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 3246
  • Number of comments : 441
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.

zingline89's last visitors

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zingline89's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of zingline89's badges

zingline89's favorite FMLs

Today, while my mom was driving me to work, we drove past a lake with an old wooden dock. She stopped the car, pointed and said, "Some guy fucked me right there. I got a splinter in my butt, though, so we finished in his car." FML

#19443097
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33036) - you deserved it (2518)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my 30th birthday. I was having a great night until I overheard my mother say, "I can't believe that thing made it to 30." FML

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

#19420355
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20689) - you deserved it (7160)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)

Today, my morning sickness decided to show itself every time I smell coffee. I work at a coffee shop. FML

Today, I woke up to shuffling noises coming from downstairs. Suspecting the worst, I jumped out of bed, and whispered over my shoulder for my girlfriend to stay quiet. Only after going downstairs and taking a swing in the dark with my bat did I figure out it was just my girlfriend foraging for snacks. FML

#19389998
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8939) - you deserved it (20542)

On 04/01/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Zack - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to sit between my parents in the car as they argued with one another for a whole hour over whether or not a thumb is a finger. FML

#19388204
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14716) - you deserved it (1200)

On 04/01/2012 at 12:15pm - misc - by totalloss - United States (Florida)

Today, I visited my new doctor, hoping that he would be able to figure out the cause of the pains I've been having for years. He told me there's nothing he can do, that half the drugs out there cause cancer anyway and that I should look into homeopathy. Great. FML

#19382117
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15790) - you deserved it (1798)

On 03/31/2012 at 12:17pm - health - by freakofnature (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while on the train to university, I realized it was my stop and quickly stood up to get off. Or I would have, if my leg hadn't gone to sleep and caused me to fall, landing face first into the crotch of the old guy in front of me. FML

#19373619
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18628) - you deserved it (2078)

On 03/29/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by LassieToe (woman) - Australia

Today, I gave myself paper cuts on the sides of my mouth while licking the cover of a pudding cup. FML

Today, my company announced a new name. They also announced new coffee mugs with the name on them. They've not announced raises in over 3 years. FML

#19324778
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16477) - you deserved it (1730)

On 03/22/2012 at 2:17am - work - by glens - United States

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

#19276070
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19961) - you deserved it (13678)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was debating if I actually do talk to myself. I was having this conversation with myself. FML

#19236548
96 comments

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML

#19235270
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19458) - you deserved it (3125)

On 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm - work - by Janitor (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I spat up blood and had horrible chest pain. My mom still made me go to school, claiming she needed to take the cat to the vet instead of me to the doctor. FML

#19234186
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26872) - you deserved it (1793)

On 03/07/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Hungrytoothbrush (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

#19230527
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34441) - you deserved it (2517)

On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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