zingline89

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Offline (the 02/13/2016 at 10:20pm)

zingline89

26Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 July 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8391
  • Number of comments : 448
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.

zingline89's page activity

Visits<b>taby448</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 2:37am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 12:07pm<b>MrValeska</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 11:15pm<b>theonewithasmile</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 2:10pm<b>Drobo</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 1:59am<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 9:41pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 1:09pm<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 7:29pm<b>dBLIZZARD</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 5:24pm<b>JohnTheDonJuan</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 8:56am<b>oyeh</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 7:19pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:39pm<b>jet223</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 3:24pm<b>bjnono001</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:57pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 11:45am<b>RaRitsujun</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 2:13pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:01pm<b>Frozen_Flames</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 12:10pm

Fucked!<b>theonewithasmile</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 8:10pm<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 3:41am<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 1:29am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 5:45pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:24pm<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 5:05pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 4:27pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:55am<b>Supaviper</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 4:46am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:56am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 1:28am<b>Chronomay</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:22pm<b>eck1220</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 12:00am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 3:45pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 9:50pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 1:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 12:27am<b>ZombieSazza</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 10:35pm

zingline89's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of zingline89's badges

zingline89's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke my leg. My mom told me I still have to go to tennis class tomorrow because the course isn't refundable. FML

by Ouch / 02/27/2015 at 9:25pm / Hong Kong / Health

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm / United States (Delaware) / Animals

Today, I was accused of shoplifting because my jacket looked "too chunky". I wasn't stealing, I'm just fat. FML

by goingtothegym / 12/08/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML

by awkwardpaul / 11/22/2013 at 5:18am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Love

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

by UnfortunatelyAmusing / 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I dreamt that I beat someone up for using Comic Sans in a project. Now I can't look at him without being irrationally angry. FML

by Ellie / 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Kansas) / Work

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

by Agax / 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML

by Abcporn / 09/25/2013 at 7:22pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, a customer kept harassing me and threatening to sue me for all I'm worth because I wouldn't give her a free refill. Her reasoning was that it's "illegal" to deny people a free refill if there's still a little drink left in the cup. FML

by goshoveafuckingfrappuccinoupyourvagyoupsychocunt / 09/07/2013 at 5:43pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, while working at Subway, I was about to take a guy's order. He quickly held up a hand and asked for someone else to make his sub, because he doesn't like "ugly people" touching his food. FML

by /(•'_'•)\ / 09/07/2013 at 12:59pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, my husband bought me a present for our three year anniversary. It was a pack of 20 cigarettes. I don't smoke. He does. FML

by LizzyJones / 08/20/2013 at 1:38pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Love

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the 3 books. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 4:06am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2013 at 4:49am / Kids

Today, the doctor told my husband that he is infertile due to slow sperm. As if this is not upsetting enough, my husband blames it on me. According to him, his sperm doesn't get 'aroused' because I'm not sexy enough. FML

by Iamdisappointed / 07/24/2013 at 7:50am / Sweden (Dalarnas Lan) / Intimacy

Today, while I was working the drive-thru, a couple came through. As I was handing back their change they began giggling. I looked down to see the man's sex-nose fully erect. FML

by theunluckylifeofme / 06/26/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (California) / Intimacy