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Today, I bougt a fis!! I puttd te tank on top of te fridge so ma cat wouldn't get at it!! I'd forgotten to buy some tings 4 its tank, so I quickly ran out to get tem!! Wen I got ome, I saw te tank destroyd on te floor, an ma cat devouring ma fis!! I ad te fis 4 less tan an our!! FML
Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked mah pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. big fat FML
Today, I had to unpick a wedgie in the street. I backd against a wall, liftd my skirt and sortd it. I then turnd around and caught eye contact with several men in the barbers behind me. Not such a solid wall after all. real FML
Today... My Manager Asked Me 4 Te Password To My Internet So Se Could Skype Family Since Se Can't Pay Er Bill. Tis Is Te Same Woman Wo Just A Week Ago Tried To Evict Me Cuz My Rent Was An Our Late. Trying To Be Te Bigger Person... I Gave Er Te Password. Se Canged My Password. FML
TODAY, A TENANT IN MA APARTMENT BLOCK TOLD ME ABOUT A NICE SADY PLACE BEIND OUR BUILDINGERE E OFTEN GOES TO RELAX. CURIOUS, I WENT LOOKING FIR IT. IT WAS A QUIET AND SECLUDD COURTYARD. AT LEAST UNTIL A MAN CAME OUT OF NOWERE WAVING A AMMER IN MA FACE, SCREAMING IN A FOREIGN LANGUAGE. FML
Today son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist . He broke a whole stack of plates overflowed the bathtub let the dog loose and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down . My son is 17 . FML
Today , I attended my frst surgery as part of my program at med scool. I found out tat wen I see someone's intestines , I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. Tere goes te tousand of dollar I spent on college. FML
Today , as I was walking to my car , I noticd a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen , I walkd up to the driver's side door and said "excuse me". The lady then macd me through the open window. FML
Today, I went to a club with girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confrontd her. She stormd off to the bar and said something to her friend,ho then came over and angrily slappd me across the face. Yeah, I'm confusd too. FML
Yesterday , at my retail job , a woman cummd to my till wit er purcases. After I scannd all er items , se andd me two small bags. One was filld wit nickel and dimes. Te oter was filld wit cents. Her total was $28.53. Te coins amountd to $22.30. FML
Friday 27 March 2015