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zetteymonsterxo

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zetteymonsterxo

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  • Number of visits : 706
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zetteymonsterxo's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

#3261545
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63108) - you deserved it (26295)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:05am - kids - by poormom (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was informed from a fellow employee at a bar that he finally "hit" the boss' wife. I work for my parents. FML

#3168193
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65179) - you deserved it (2538)

On 06/24/2009 at 5:59am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I thought I saw a woodchuck far out in my yard. I wanted to take a cool picture of it so I slowly crept closer and closer to it. I spent half an hour sneaking up on a log. FML

#2900113
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16565) - you deserved it (48871)

On 06/14/2009 at 11:37pm - misc - by thelarkscaw (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML

#2656270
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43981) - you deserved it (11345)

On 06/06/2009 at 10:03am - animals - by imfromtexas02 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17950) - you deserved it (140313)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was pulling my trolley luggage at the airport when I passed 2 cute girls smiling at me. Thinking I looked real cool, I kept on walking without paying heed to anything else. Then my brother shouted asking me what was I doing, only to realise that the handle had come off a few metres back. FML

#1954003
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9839) - you deserved it (37572)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:41am - misc - by NotSoCool (man) - Singapore

Today, for my girlfriend's birthday, I got her an external hard drive and my grandmother's engagement ring. When she opened both boxes, I took her hand and looked deep in her eyes and told her to pick whichever she wanted. She took the external hard drive, even though she already has one. FML

#657715
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66246) - you deserved it (12632)

On 03/28/2009 at 4:07am - love - by Anon. (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex and I was on top. I was really into it and in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said "oh, look at the time, I gotta get home". She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

#618347
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84640) - you deserved it (16062)

On 03/26/2009 at 4:37am - intimacy - by crap (man) - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, we got our yearbooks for school. I opened to my profile to see that they misspelled my first name which is James. They wrote Lames. FML

#598465
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (147037) - you deserved it (11588)

On 03/25/2009 at 12:32pm - misc - by rusty2020 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was going to a Harry Potter convention since I love the books so much. On my drive there I got lost, and it only got worse when my car broke down. Since I forgot my cell phone I decided to try and hitch a ride. I stood on the side of a road for two hours dressed like Ron Weasley. FML

#238492
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27390) - you deserved it (53918)

On 03/07/2009 at 11:03pm - misc - by GrLifeusx (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72384) - you deserved it (3791)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

#21834
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79521) - you deserved it (24692)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by peacock_mina19 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was collecting on a bet I had with a buddy on a sports game. He owed me lunch. I have a huge crush on the waitress and told him. She asked if we wanted the checks split and he said, "No, my boyfriend doesn't have any money." FML

#4148
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26907) - you deserved it (5096)

On 01/31/2009 at 1:19pm - love - by MichiganExile - United States (Michigan)



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