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zenkuru

Offline (the 12/17/2014 at 5:20am) | Search for a member

zenkuru

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zenkuruzenkuru
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 September 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 105
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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zenkuru's page activity

Visits<b>hardesty</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 5:33pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 8:17am<b>ItsFeztho</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 5:28am<b>schwaka</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 7:32am<b>dabears1011234</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 9:23pm<b>aleximo</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:35pm<b>unlucky_lucy</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 4:12pm<b>MrPurple5106</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 6:31pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:59pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 1:35pm<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 11:24pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 10:13pm<b>Adam5858</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 8:01pm

zenkuru's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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zenkuru's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43014) - you deserved it (6514)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

#21288917
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31255) - you deserved it (2608)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:55am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

#21288518
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26347) - you deserved it (21780)

On 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

#21287735
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31523) - you deserved it (3136)

On 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm - kids - by lexigan4 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my little sister decided to color-in my favorite black-and-white comic book. It was worth over $200. When I told my mother, she said, "Oh that old thing? I thought it was a stupid coloring book you were too stupid to color." FML

#21287570
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37881) - you deserved it (3618)

On 10/29/2014 at 9:09am - kids - by NoColor (woman) - United States (California)

Today, trying to be a good role model for the kids behind me, I stopped and thoroughly checked both sides of the road before crossing. I still managed to get hit by a car. FML

#21287500
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34324) - you deserved it (6628)

On 10/29/2014 at 4:19am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, as my boyfriend left my house, I gave him a long, tight hug. So tight that he threw up. FML

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29510) - you deserved it (7817)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33553) - you deserved it (4569)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, I got back from a weekend at my best friend's house. Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game. It involves sticking duct tape to their pubic hairs, ripping them out, and sticking as many as possible on my face and body before I wake up. FML

#21276742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31701) - you deserved it (3335)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:17am - misc - by wtfguys - United States

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42571) - you deserved it (5136)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42542) - you deserved it (8788)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30112) - you deserved it (3822)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

#21268936
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19572) - you deserved it (40090)

On 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm - misc - by ThatNewCarSmell (woman) - United States (California)



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