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zenkuru's FML badges
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zenkuru's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 10:29am / United States (California) / Kids
by not impressed / 10/09/2015 at 2:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML
by Anonymous / 10/09/2015 at 2:02pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/09/2015 at 5:06am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/08/2015 at 11:10am / United States (Florida) / Work
by aishyaslife89 / 10/06/2015 at 6:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
by ph2222 / 10/05/2015 at 1:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by jshsnan / 10/04/2015 at 7:12pm / United States (California) / Kids
by steam_engenius / 10/04/2015 at 2:11pm / United States (Nevada) / Health
by Till We Pass Out / 10/03/2015 at 11:30am / United Kingdom (Calderdale) / Health
Today, at the swimming pool, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up on my 5-year-old daughter underwater and surprise her. I grabbed her by the sides, and she shrieked. A moment later, a brown cloud erupted from her swimsuit. Cue screaming and a mass panic from the other kids. FML
by Anonymous / 10/03/2015 at 3:00am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend was shaving his beard in the bathroom when I left. An hour later, I found him exasperated after having shaved half his body. I had to help him shave every nook and cranny left because he said he was in too deep and couldn't turn back. Yes, his bumhole too. FML
by NothowIimaginedmyday / 10/03/2015 at 12:00am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my parents pranked me hard. They spent breakfast messing with my head, all to convince me that I was dreaming. I got so excited at finally having a lucid dream that I ran outside in my pajamas, yelling "Woo-hoo!" and trying to fly. Nothing happened. People saw. FML
by Anonymous / 10/02/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sitting outside in a pair of shorts. After about 15 minutes of getting weird looks from people, I realized my cock was sticking out of a hole that wasn't in my shorts when I put them on. FML
by soulaar / 10/02/2015 at 10:22am / Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh) / Miscellaneous
by danceinconverse / 05/22/2015 at 4:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…