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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7126) - you deserved it (720)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3865) - you deserved it (6665)
On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States
Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet. A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1812) - you deserved it (11475)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3230) - you deserved it (5977)
On 05/08/2012 at 7:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, the school nurse called me in. She said she knew I was pregnant and she was worried about how it was affecting my grades. I'm not pregnant. Apparently I'm just stupid and fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8693) - you deserved it (1317)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:25am - health - by CharlieOrion (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5179) - you deserved it (1188)
On 04/23/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by GogoTheGreat - United States (Texas)
Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3102) - you deserved it (23870)
On 04/13/2012 at 7:14pm - love - by c*nt (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5615) - you deserved it (688)
On 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm - animals - by Lee (woman) - United States
Today, I confided to my dad that my girlfriend had dumped me for another guy. He said "good" and explained that given how overpopulated the planet is, he's actually disappointed that I'm not gay. His advice was: "just wank it off and move on". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6463) - you deserved it (715)
On 03/30/2012 at 6:21pm - love - by sad (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)
Today, I learned a valuable lesson: Make sure you learn to swim at a very young age, or else you might end up a in a swimming class with a bunch 3 and 4 year-olds, taught by your crush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6321) - you deserved it (1538)
On 03/26/2012 at 10:51am - misc - by stupdude3 (man) - United States
Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7322) - you deserved it (1027)
On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States
Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9383) - you deserved it (1487)
On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20287) - you deserved it (2291)
On 03/11/2012 at 8:38am - work - by aprilmay91 - United States
Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1773) - you deserved it (28889)
On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was at a meeting. One of the other members decided to share that their cat had passed away recently. I got an uncontrollable nervous laugh, started crying because I was laughing so hard, and left the room while everyone watched in horror. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8213) - you deserved it (11350)
On 03/08/2012 at 12:47am - work - by Honey Badger (woman) - United States
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