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zaleh

Offline (the 04/16/2015 at 8:11pm) | Search for a member

zaleh

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 10 June 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2756
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About zaleh : not yet

zaleh's page activity

Visits<b>curticus</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 9:00am<b>romi2212</b> - the 03/31/2012 at 5:34pm<b>weatherxveins</b> - the 12/12/2011 at 2:36am<b>ThatOneChick14</b> - the 07/30/2011 at 4:54pm

zaleh's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of zaleh's badges

zaleh's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

#21392458
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28195) - you deserved it (4932)

On 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out my girlfriend keeps my toenails in her deceased grandmother's prized music box. She says it's to, "Keep the box natural." I don't understand why she does this, or what she means by "natural." FML

#21383678
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24182) - you deserved it (2052)

On 03/29/2015 at 5:18pm - misc - by coldasfire - United States

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

#21382327
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28413) - you deserved it (3026)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by njh - Ireland

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

#21382179
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22343) - you deserved it (8726)

On 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm - misc - by comfort_ - United States (Georgia)

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32805) - you deserved it (6565)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States

Today, I took the biggest, most excruciatingly painful crap of my life. It was so bad that I couldn't walk straight for a good 20 minutes afterwards. Long enough for my boyfriend to film me limping around and post the clip to Facebook with the caption "#anal ftw ;)". FML

#21379420
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29895) - you deserved it (3536)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28608) - you deserved it (3409)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was wearing a new tank top that was really cute. I later was talking to an attractive guy and thought he was giggling at me because he thought I was being cute and funny. I then realized he was giggling at the fact that I only shaved one armpit. FML

#21378703
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27603) - you deserved it (9328)

On 03/21/2015 at 12:25am - love - by rayraydayday - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25835) - you deserved it (3094)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I was helping out during the school play's interval. My head of year jokingly asked me to follow him around with these mini cocktail sausages for the rest of the school year. I thought it would be witty to reply, "Does that make me your official sausage holder?" FML

#21378332
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24898) - you deserved it (62)

On 03/20/2015 at 10:41am - love - by MirandaJones (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

#21378092
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27702) - you deserved it (3183)

On 03/19/2015 at 11:22pm - love - by TooShortToCleanThat - United States

Today, after telling my parents that I want to be a vegetarian, I got grounded. Apparently, "black people can't be vegetarians" and, I'm "crazy for even suggesting something like that." FML

#21378047
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32234) - you deserved it (4607)

On 03/19/2015 at 10:23pm - misc - by shawnsmuffins - United States (Florida)

Today, I gave my friend condoms since he didn't have any and he was planning on "getting lucky." Little did I know he was planning on "getting lucky" with my sister. FML

#21378013
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32079) - you deserved it (43)

On 03/19/2015 at 9:06pm - love - by Fred - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was sitting in the airport, watching the baggage handlers load the plane I was about to get on. They were being really rough with it, one bag came open and all the clothes spilled out onto the tarmac. The clothes looked familiar. They were mine. FML

#21378005
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30412) - you deserved it (2044)

On 03/19/2015 at 8:54pm - misc - by Hm (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, it was my first day working as a pharmacist. I quickly discovered that customers not only think that it makes me qualified to offer free medical advice, but they also have no qualms about showing me their various lumps, bumps, and vaginal leakages. FML

#21377662
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (177) - you deserved it (3124)

On 03/19/2015 at 9:19am - work - by MyPoorEyes (man) - Australia (Victoria)



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