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zaleh

Offline (the 08/13/2015 at 12:18pm) | Search for a member

zaleh

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 10 June 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3428
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About zaleh : not yet

zaleh's page activity

Visits<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 2:40pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 12:21pm<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:08am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 12:10am<b>curticus</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 9:00am<b>romi2212</b> - the 03/31/2012 at 5:34pm<b>weatherxveins</b> - the 12/12/2011 at 2:36am<b>ThatOneChick14</b> - the 07/30/2011 at 4:54pm

Fucked!<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 12:45pm<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 6:10am

zaleh's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of zaleh's badges

zaleh's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to serve an incredibly rude and irrationally angry customer, but I managed to keep my cool. When he finally went to leave with his purchase, I wished him a good day. He whirled around and yelled "I'll have whatever the fuck kind of day I want, bitch!" FML

#21453572
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26328) - you deserved it (1792)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:23pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

#21446710
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28990) - you deserved it (4799)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by strangely - United States (California)

Today, I lost out on a job opportunity because the interviewer said my "fake fangs are unprofessional and frankly disturbing". The "fangs" are my real canines, and they have always looked this way. FML

#21446532
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24637) - you deserved it (1533)

On 07/24/2015 at 1:24pm - work - by (-,..,-) (woman) - France

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24618) - you deserved it (5083)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML

#21445449
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16173) - you deserved it (23766)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:21pm - health - by Anonypiss (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I checked my son's browser history, as he's been acting strangely around his computer recently. I found several bizarre Google searches, including but not limited to: "unicorn dick-farts", "sharting kittens", and "can you get AIDS from Asians?" What the fuck is wrong with him? FML

#21414033
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28160) - you deserved it (4631)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML

#21412078
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25127) - you deserved it (7106)

On 05/18/2015 at 4:40pm - misc - by Swabidizop - United States (Colorado)

Today, one of my idiot co-workers thought it'd be hilarious to "fix" my car while I was working. Now every time I step on the brake pedal, the horn goes off. FML

#21412007
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29051) - you deserved it (2463)

On 05/18/2015 at 2:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my dad drove me to the airport. As I got out of the car, he said, "You better pop that zit on your face, security might think it's a bomb". FML

#21406694
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30639) - you deserved it (2795)

On 05/08/2015 at 9:44am - misc - by brittrus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to say to my 23-year-old son that it's not a compliment to tell a woman that he wants to jam his cock down her throat. FML

#21405973
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34382) - you deserved it (5141)

On 05/06/2015 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by dadoftheyear (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend complained that I only respond to his flirtations with exasperation and annoyance. Apparently, grunting and humping my leg like an ill-mannered dog while I'm trying to wash dishes is his way of flirting. FML

#21405919
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31780) - you deserved it (3715)

On 05/06/2015 at 10:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I heard a loud beep for over an hour. It didn't come from my phone or even an alarm of some sort. It was my son pretending to be a smoke alarm. FML

Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML

#21395572
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39549) - you deserved it (5125)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:01am - kids - by Anonymus (woman) - Sweden

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML



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