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zachsipes

Offline (the 06/02/2015 at 9:06pm) | Search for a member

zachsipes

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 June 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2026
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About zachsipes : Follow me on Twitter!! @sipeszach

zachsipes's page activity

Visits<b>JoyAda</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 9:46am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 7:46am<b>watermelon1</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 4:17pm<b>clevergirl98</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 6:47pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 12:16am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 11:17pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 8:24pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 1:53am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 2:27pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 7:50pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 8:30am<b>YUNOLIKE</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 12:39am<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 7:37pm<b>HaneenDixon</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 12:23am<b>noxiffic</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 10:14am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 10:01pm

Fucked!<b>clevergirl98</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 12:45am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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zachsipes's favorite FMLs

Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML

#20541069
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37283) - you deserved it (4748)

On 03/12/2013 at 6:43pm - kids - by um... maybe (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I invited my long-lost best friend over, because I haven't seen her much since she got a new boyfriend. 20 minutes into hanging out, he showed up at my door. He still hasn't left, and they're having sex on my couch right now. FML

#20540616
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56623) - you deserved it (7278)

On 03/12/2013 at 9:22am - intimacy - by kenleybunch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

#20540243
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33227) - you deserved it (51108) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, since I hadn't eaten and was about to have a three hour class, I bought Panda Express. I sat opposite my classroom to eat. Soon after I started eating, a wad of saliva dropped into my bowl, and I heard someone yell "BONUS POINTS!" from the second floor. FML

Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML

#20539367
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29120) - you deserved it (2836)

On 03/11/2013 at 10:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML

#20538066
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51822) - you deserved it (6348)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:08pm - kids - by Amanda - Canada

Today, my girlfriend accused me of being a feeder, saying that's why she's been putting on so much weight. When I said it might be because she eats at McDonalds everyday, and that I was willing to start cooking low-calorie foods for us, she hit me. Then she went to McDonalds. FML

#20538059
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42275) - you deserved it (4895)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:03pm - love - by Raiden (man) - United Kingdom (Barnsley)

Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

#20537800
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32015) - you deserved it (8455)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32285) - you deserved it (3646)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML

#20537344
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29407) - you deserved it (5288)

On 03/09/2013 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, instead of actually teaching us something, our college professor excitedly showed us the godawful Harlem Shake video he made with his friends. FML

#20533295
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33096) - you deserved it (4692)

On 03/06/2013 at 6:51am - work - by Will this stupid fad ever end? (man) - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML

#20524189
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38169) - you deserved it (6076)

On 02/27/2013 at 8:49am - misc - by anony (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML

#20521664
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32335) - you deserved it (8103)

On 02/25/2013 at 2:16pm - kids - by soaked (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML

#20520875
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27580) - you deserved it (3301)

On 02/24/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by why the fuck would you do that - United States (Arizona)



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