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zachsipes

Offline (the 12/10/2014 at 4:18am) | Search for a member

zachsipes

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1266
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About zachsipes : Follow me on Twitter!! @sipeszach

zachsipes's page activity

Visits<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 7:50pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 3:28am<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 8:30am<b>YUNOLIKE</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 12:39am<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 7:37pm<b>HaneenDixon</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 12:23am<b>noxiffic</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 10:14am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 10:01pm

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zachsipes's favorite FMLs

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10476) - you deserved it (75671) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out why my cell phone has been going missing every night for the last few months. My sister has been "borrowing" it so she can hold it against her crotch and repeatedly push the vibrate button. FML

#15127410
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54248) - you deserved it (4713)

On 02/26/2011 at 3:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out I have a huge infected boil on my vagina. The worst part was that I wasn't the one to discover this. My boyfriend was. FML

#14665942
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33477) - you deserved it (9044)

On 01/21/2011 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by alaskan1989 - United States (Alaska)

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99342) - you deserved it (5417)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

#13756412
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20598) - you deserved it (59727)

On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML

#12832697
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36451) - you deserved it (6538)

On 08/31/2010 at 1:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went on a double date with my bestfriend. At the end of the night, her boyfriend gave her a long kiss, and texted her 5 minutes after we left to say he missed her already. My boyfriend picked his nose, then gave me a fist bump as a goodbye. FML

#12698820
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34636) - you deserved it (6342)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:40am - love - by Sara1990 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

#12099804
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12653) - you deserved it (113464)

On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized my girlfriend has more hair on her abdomen than I have on mine. FML

#7847361
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25142) - you deserved it (5665)

On 02/03/2010 at 2:34pm - misc - by cogu - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he tried to put his hand inside my pants. I didn't want it to be that easy so I denied, but he insisted a lot and I finally let him. He started to sing "We Are The Champions." FML

#7020893
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9129) - you deserved it (19468)

On 12/29/2009 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by queen (woman) - Brazil (Minas Gerais)

Today, I woke up and found that someone had taken a dump on my car. They'd apparently felt bad about it, as they'd then keyed "sorry" into the door. FML

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

#5851325
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20108) - you deserved it (3569)

On 10/16/2009 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by damnit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I thought it would be fun to tease my dog by standing above her and hitting each of her paws repeatedly. My dog thought it would be fun to jump up and bite at my chest whilst I wasn't wearing a shirt. I just spent four hours in hospital getting my nipple sewn back on. FML

#5289656
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11488) - you deserved it (80388)

On 09/16/2009 at 9:24am - animals - by nipped (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

#4998689
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47843) - you deserved it (15971)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

#4679232
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85757) - you deserved it (7448)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)



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