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zachsipes

Offline (the 12/10/2014 at 4:18am) | Search for a member

zachsipes

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1273
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About zachsipes : Follow me on Twitter!! @sipeszach

zachsipes's page activity

Visits<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 7:50pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 3:28am<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 8:30am<b>YUNOLIKE</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 12:39am<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 7:37pm<b>HaneenDixon</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 12:23am<b>noxiffic</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 10:14am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 10:01pm

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zachsipes's favorite FMLs

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

#21300331
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31935) - you deserved it (3306)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by no - United States

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34871) - you deserved it (3415)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me via Facebook chat. When I asked her why, she replied "You know why." and blocked me. No, I don't know. FML

#21299125
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31660) - you deserved it (2546)

On 11/14/2014 at 7:11pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML

#21298550
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32769) - you deserved it (2317)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:21pm - misc - by JoshTheUnluckyFromKentucky - United States (California)

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

#21292789
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28871) - you deserved it (3324)

On 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by aineroo (woman) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43032) - you deserved it (6515)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37594) - you deserved it (10601)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

#21034785
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46345) - you deserved it (5028)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:07am - kids - by sickmom (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

#20985190
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46632) - you deserved it (5138)

On 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend got on one knee and started talking about how we met. Knowing what was coming, I started tearing up, absolutely sure he was going to propose. Just as I was about to say yes, he quickly stood up and yelled "HAH, JUST KIDDING". FML

#20967193
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59856) - you deserved it (5548)

On 11/22/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML

#20966996
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38200) - you deserved it (3205)

On 11/22/2013 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while babysitting a girl, I told her to be quiet so she wouldn't wake her little brother. In reply, she told me that she would kill me, wake her brother up to show him my dead body, then draw all over my face. I'm stuck with her for another two hours. FML

#20966535
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44538) - you deserved it (3334)

On 11/22/2013 at 1:20am - kids - by spooked (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my debate partner repeatedly said "You mad, bro?" to the opposing team in our college debate class. That debate was worth a considerable portion of our grade. FML

#20959913
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40605) - you deserved it (2892)

On 11/16/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by gonnafail (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad walked in on me jacking off. He swore and told me to lock my door next time. Later on I heard him snickering and telling my mom that I jack off "real weird." FML

#20957730
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45901) - you deserved it (14673)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by jack s.b. (man) - United States (Texas)



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