Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

z3r0d4z3

Offline (the 11/25/2014 at 9:16am) | Search for a member

z3r0d4z3

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 November 1978 (36 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 390
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About z3r0d4z3 : suby rox

z3r0d4z3's page activity

Visits<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:47am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:36pm<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:23am<b>feven</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 6:47pm<b>teresa96706</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 4:18am<b>pyromaniac9</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 9:15pm<b>drivingmissdaisy</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 2:01pm<b>crue88</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:49am<b>AvengingAngelx</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 11:56pm<b>PresidentNorth</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 3:13pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 12:57pm<b>Ravike</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 4:16am<b>sk8rdud3</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 2:28am<b>jerryj</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 2:41am<b>BreathingClover</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 11:34pm<b>dubfan24</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 12:41am<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 8:17pm<b>Sathane</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:25am

z3r0d4z3's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of z3r0d4z3's badges

z3r0d4z3's favorite FMLs

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33352) - you deserved it (6448)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after my first day at work at a local daycare, I found out that I'm not entitled to breaks because I'm the only worker there who doesn't smoke. My boss asked me, ''What do you need a break for?'' FML

#21284495
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36286) - you deserved it (2555)

On 10/24/2014 at 4:52pm - work - by Anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was eating a hot fudge sundae and I complained that the fudge was at the very bottom and I couldn't reach it with my spoon. My husband muttered "Fat girl problems." FML

#21260102
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36543) - you deserved it (11238)

On 09/17/2014 at 4:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, some assface hacked my recently deceased friend's Facebook account. The person changed my friend's location to "Hell", then posted a status saying how hot the weather was, and replied "I wish :'(" to someone who'd said my friend was in a better place now. FML

#21257037
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44089) - you deserved it (3000)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:11pm - misc - by he's not the one going to hell (man) - Australia

Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML

#21254463
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39683) - you deserved it (3636)

On 09/08/2014 at 1:56pm - health - by jkim - United States (California)

Today, I was punched in the face because my uncontrollable hiccups were "annoying". FML

#21250817
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35519) - you deserved it (3815)

On 09/02/2014 at 10:13pm - health - by soccer8goalie - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42131) - you deserved it (5973)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML

#21234068
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33196) - you deserved it (8427)

On 08/10/2014 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I paid $325 to have the vet tell me that my 19-year-old cat ISN'T dying, she just had anxiety shits because we were gone on vacation for so long. FML

#21231104
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34428) - you deserved it (5581)

On 08/06/2014 at 5:35pm - animals - by chynna (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while I was proposing. FML

#21223358
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53469) - you deserved it (7338)

On 07/28/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by rejected - United States (California)

Today, I got rear-ended because my ultra-clingy girlfriend wouldn't let go of my hand long enough for me to shift gears. FML

#21220481
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43388) - you deserved it (10315)

On 07/25/2014 at 5:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

#21207892
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41634) - you deserved it (6149)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I texted my mom asking how she was doing. Apparently she's great, and on her honeymoon. I didn't know she was getting married, or that my parents had just gotten divorced. FML

#21206148
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45386) - you deserved it (4147)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:02pm - misc - by morgan_rumm (woman) -

Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML

#21194154
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28851) - you deserved it (42195)

On 06/30/2014 at 7:39pm - kids - by BaWanda (woman) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: