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yzzami

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yzzami

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 161
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About yzzami : Go to Walmart and buy a sense of humor. Aisle 5 next to the tampons

yzzami's page activity

Visits<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 4:57am<b>rylaii</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 1:07am<b>coltonte3</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:34am<b>PIGaming</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 11:48pm<b>hardflip95</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 10:33pm<b>tromo47</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 9:43am<b>Ed19602</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 6:58am<b>sallee23444</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 6:34pm<b>starile</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 4:04pm<b>becka2s</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 3:55pm<b>jessaaroooo</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 3:23pm<b>robert_345</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 12:47pm<b>kylemannsaustins</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 7:36pm<b>FinJage</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 7:08am<b>hurtandabused</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 12:19am<b>Not_Creative</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 11:17am<b>Tika876</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 12:12pm<b>bnymets1</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 11:28pm

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100 kick ass comments

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yzzami's favorite FMLs

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17977) - you deserved it (88613)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML

#20684256
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37421) - you deserved it (4093)

On 05/24/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by unwilling redneck - United States

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

#20683275
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34761) - you deserved it (3270)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by redneckfamily - United States (Washington)

Today, I finished installing remote access CCTV cameras around my house due to the high rate of burglaries around my neighborhood. I turn it on to see my teenage son rubbing one out on the couch. FML

#20563419
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39204) - you deserved it (22626)

On 03/28/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by couch_potato (man) -

Today, I was cleaning a house. While dusting a rickety nightstand, a drawer fell open and a light-up dildo fell out and turned on. I couldn't figure out how to turn it off. FML

#20541893
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38015) - you deserved it (4233)

On 03/13/2013 at 9:36am - intimacy - by OptimusVader (woman) - United States

Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML

#20534043
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27625) - you deserved it (6302)

On 03/06/2013 at 9:39pm - work - by shittysongs - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML

#20420364
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32607) - you deserved it (3669)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - love - by un_christmas - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I sold some weights that were way too heavy for me on Craigslist. I felt okay with not being able to lift them when I saw the other man, who was a pretty buff dude; that is until of course he informed me he was buying them for his wife. FML

#20407956
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26178) - you deserved it (7764)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:33pm - misc - by Johnny (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while trying to change my visiting cousin's opinion about our state being "redneck and white trash", we stumbled upon a proposal/celebration in a Walmart. So much for changing her opinion. FML

#20066095
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16791) - you deserved it (3369)

On 09/10/2012 at 8:48am - misc - by liquidknight - United States

Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML

#20037445
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20300) - you deserved it (1530)

On 08/23/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

#18086269
517 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9833) - you deserved it (178918)

On 10/27/2011 at 1:01am - work - by charlie3289 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

#17344218
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31454) - you deserved it (2870)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML

#15052365
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7242) - you deserved it (96270)

On 02/20/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by :/ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was standing in a queue when an old lady turned, looked straight at me, and asked me to hold her bag. Confused, I took a hold of it. She started screaming for help claiming I was stealing her shopping. Turns out, she was talking to her husband behind me. FML

#7739701
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27036) - you deserved it (2900)

On 01/31/2010 at 9:46am - misc - by bthms - Sent from mobile version

Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML

#7185908
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35090) - you deserved it (2928)

On 01/06/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)



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