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yvonnep

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yvonnep

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Visits<b>martin8337</b> - yesterday at 8:16am<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 7:20am<b>SunTzu2</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 3:40am

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yvonnep's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18233) - you deserved it (23848)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML

#21305863
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32596) - you deserved it (2618)

On 11/25/2014 at 3:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

#21304429
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36089) - you deserved it (4229)

On 11/23/2014 at 11:34am - intimacy - by 404: fuck not given (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I spent nearly an hour helping a customer pick out an engagement ring. I rang him up, picked out a super cute box for the ring, and wished him luck. Later I realized I never put the ring inside the box. FML

#21304265
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31087) - you deserved it (15412)

On 11/23/2014 at 1:10am - misc - by KilledTheMoment - United States (Illinois)

Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML

#21302674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31030) - you deserved it (2597)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my sister's fiancé. I would have been happier for her if he hadn't been mine a month ago when I introduced them. FML

#21301904
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37985) - you deserved it (2605)

On 11/19/2014 at 3:27am - love - by MissAggravared - United States (Idaho)

Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML

#21301400
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42304) - you deserved it (3520)

On 11/18/2014 at 1:57pm - misc - by steak through the heart - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

#21301367
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38342) - you deserved it (3653)

On 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm - misc - by drugsforthugs - United States (California)

Today, while lying in bed cuddling with my cat after getting stood up, I found out that even 80-year-old Charles Manson is engaged to be married. FML

#21301256
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30230) - you deserved it (3051)

On 11/18/2014 at 5:41am - love - by jessiejaybee (woman) - United States

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

#21300331
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31927) - you deserved it (3305)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by no - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27479) - you deserved it (2960)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to endure my father going on a sexist rant about how women shouldn't be allowed to go to university because it's "unrealistic" since "all women" become stay-at-home mums. This is the same man who threatened to kick me out if I dropped out of uni. FML

#21299878
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30941) - you deserved it (2407)

On 11/15/2014 at 10:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44017) - you deserved it (3845)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried being rebellious for the first time in my life by sneaking out past my curfew. I decided to use my bedroom window to stealthily leave the house. I ended up twisting my ankle when I tried to make my "grand" escape. FML

#21294808
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20437) - you deserved it (26511)

On 11/08/2014 at 3:33pm - health - by thatsureshowedme (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



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