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Today, I was working as the shift manager at my job at a fast food restaurant. Our company policy states that all employees must be clean shaven before coming to work. I had to inform one of the employees, Kris, that they had to shave before clocking in. Kris is a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56850) - you deserved it (2069)
On 04/02/2009 at 2:21pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my brother's new girlfriend, who is blind, asked to feel my face so she could tell what I look like. She said i was "unique". A blind chick just told me I was ugly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53034) - you deserved it (3922)
On 03/11/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by GreenScar (man) - United States (California)
Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27485) - you deserved it (49008)
On 03/10/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I arrived at work only to be arrested and accused of stealing over $8000 from my job. 5 hours later at the police station, the discovery was made that the actual thief had an employee ID one digit different than mine. He works at another location over 1200 miles away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58948) - you deserved it (1669)
On 03/09/2009 at 10:35pm - work - by Jong (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I got back to my apartment from being away for the past week on Spring break. I found the locks on my apartment changed and all my things on the curb, many of them broken or stolen. I ran to the leasing office to see what had happened. Turns out it was an accounting error on their part. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78189) - you deserved it (2319)
On 03/09/2009 at 8:12am - misc - by Homeless (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I woke up at my grandparents house since my mom was out of town, still half asleep i went to brush my teeth. Mid brush my mouth started getting numb I looked again at the tooth paste I used..turns out it was my grandpa's anti-itch anal cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56338) - you deserved it (15766)
On 03/08/2009 at 7:57pm - misc - by poop - United States (Ohio)
Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML
I agree, your life sucks (173591) - you deserved it (12043)
On 03/07/2009 at 12:51am - misc - by shit_upon_literally (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to use a public bathroom with my friend. I heard someone, who I thought was my friend talking, and I replied with "I hate being on my rag, I get constipated a lot." When I opened the stall door, I saw two guys using the urinals. I went into the men's restroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11662) - you deserved it (35694)
On 03/06/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by MNLucyy - United States (Nebraska)
Monday 20 May 2013
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