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About ysrhael : Hi, I'm 18, going to law school, love music, love reading. I'm 6'5" tall, message me, you know you want to ;)
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
today mah husband dropped me off at work . Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby miss you" . I asked him about it . He said "I don't know wat you're talking about Megan" . My name isn't Megan . Not even close . FML
Today, I'm playing basketball with mah little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says "You're a bitch." He's 6. After asking where he hered that word, he respondd with "Daddy calls you that when you're around." FML
Today, a girl I really liked mentioned se's ome alone and tat se was really really lonely. Se offered fir me to come over and watc a few movies wit er, and as I got prepared to leave se sent me a text saying " can u pick up my friend Spencer? " FML
yesterday my 5 year old nephew showd me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I looool smild an said, ( Wow! Now, how about some blue martians! ) He lookd at me an replid, ( How about some blue shut the fuck up?! ) FML
Today, mah boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'vrginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'vrgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
I was volunteering at a nursing ome calling bingo numbers!! One woman stood up an started making noises, so I assumed se ad won an started clapping!! Se ten fell on te floor an died of a eart attack!! I essentially applauded looool er deat!! FML
Today, I Turnd On My Camera To Find Pictures Of My Dad's Secretary Giving Him A Blowjob. Minutes Later, I Hear A Scream From Another Room As My 12-year-old Sister Discovers Similar Pictures On HER Camera. Mom An Dad Say It's No Big Deal. FML
Today , I Was At A Restaurant With A Girl I Like , An As I Was Getting Mah Wallet Out , I Dropped A Condom. She Didn't See Anything , An I Didn't Dare Pick It Up In Case I Drew Attention To The "object". The Waiter Walked Past , Picked Up , An Held It Out To Me With A Huge Grin. FML
Friday 27 March 2015