About ysrhael : Hi, I'm 18, going to law school, love music, love reading. I'm 6'5" tall, message me, you know you want to ;)
ysrhael's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
ysrhael's favorite FMLs
Today, when I picked up my repeat subscription of anti-anxiety medication, they had changed the packaging to be more 'child safe'. Now it's so hard to get the pills out that I had an anxiety attack trying to take one. FML
by VoiceMail / 04/09/2011 at 8:53am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
by Tweety / 04/09/2011 at 7:40am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my grandma got up at 6:30am, clattered about the bathroom then sang religious songs at the top of her voice for half an hour. Apparently this is her normal routine, weekends included. She is staying with us for a month. FML
by Riley / 04/09/2011 at 4:21am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Miscellaneous
by confused / 04/09/2011 at 4:08am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was looking in my grandparents' drawers and cupboards to find a blanket, but instead found a stash of sex toys, and a male G-string with a horse on the front. The best bit? When you press the horse's nose, it neighs. FML
by fuundmental/// / 04/09/2011 at 1:46am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by blehhx / 04/09/2011 at 1:32am / United States / Animals
by WhatTheBleep / 04/09/2011 at 12:02am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love
Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML
by FistFighter / 04/09/2011 at 12:01am / United States (California) / Health
by notfunny / 04/08/2011 at 9:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I was having some intense sex with my boyfriend. I was wailing so loud that my neighbors decided to call the police on us. According to them, it sounded like I was "being tortured to death". FML
by Anonymous / 04/08/2011 at 7:42pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
by tbright010 / 04/08/2011 at 6:48pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, while making my son lunch, he pooped, took off his diaper, stepped in it, and then climbed to the gate to call for me. When I arrived, he had a big smile on his face and exclaimed, "Look!" Shit footprints were everywhere. FML
by heathersmorin / 04/08/2011 at 3:18pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/08/2011 at 12:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by jonh_215 / 04/08/2011 at 12:09pm / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 04/08/2011 at 11:30am / United States / Health
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…
- Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah...… Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen,… Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw…