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yoursucklives
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1322
  • Number of comments : 277
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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yoursucklives's favorite FMLs

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

#15024554
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34165) - you deserved it (3417)

On 02/18/2011 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30752) - you deserved it (3886)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wife thinks I will agree to anything she says if she just pleasures me orally. I now found out, she is correct. FML

#14341625
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8465) - you deserved it (33501)

On 12/26/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML

#13777689
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36497) - you deserved it (6655)

On 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

#13287262
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25874) - you deserved it (2895)

On 10/02/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

#11389778
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15284) - you deserved it (44852)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

#9070560
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22673) - you deserved it (9802)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML

#8861010
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8144) - you deserved it (24180)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6341) - you deserved it (50112)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of us getting married some day. She said she wasn't sure about me yet and that we may want to go in different directions soon. We've been dating for three years and I had the ring in my pocket at the moment. FML

#6873751
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31085) - you deserved it (2526)

On 12/21/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by chao (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML

#6404415
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21726) - you deserved it (16578)

On 11/22/2009 at 12:39pm - misc - by nolinguist (woman) - Austria (Oberosterreich)

Today, after I have spent $3,000 dollars in preparations to move in with my girlfriend of 2 and 1/2 years, she confesses she's a mental patient who stole someone elses identity. She was telling the truth. FML

#5811757
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34823) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/13/2009 at 2:38am - misc - by IMayBeAFool (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I moved out of my parents basement. After I hugged my parents I walked out the door only to remember I left my phone in the kitchen. I open the door and see my parents dancing. FML

#5644801
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31069) - you deserved it (12080)

On 10/04/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by neverStopLaughin - United States (Colorado)

Today, I told my girlfriend of 9 months that I was ready for marriage and start having kids. She hasn't called or texted me since. FML

#5479094
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13866) - you deserved it (56884)

On 09/26/2009 at 1:34am - love - by bigdawg702 (man) - United States

Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML

#5424081
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14045) - you deserved it (38708)

On 09/23/2009 at 5:35am - misc - by DusterOverBits (woman) - United Kingdom



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