About yoursucklives : "I think people need to make out more."- Joshua Homme
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The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34974) - you deserved it (15526)
On 04/06/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by Evalynne - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I really feel about her, due in no small part to how flirty she's been towards me lately. Turns out she's really just a skank and was trying to make my best friend "jealous". He's gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30077) - you deserved it (2683)
On 03/21/2013 at 4:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37499) - you deserved it (7369)
On 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by ldn (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32240) - you deserved it (14641)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:43am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39419) - you deserved it (4427)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28897) - you deserved it (11752)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:01am - intimacy - by meeee (woman) - United States
Today, I went out to a restaurant to meet a girl that I met online. When I arrived I texted her and she said she she was wearing a blue shirt. The only person that was wearing anything blue was a fat man smiling in the corner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31508) - you deserved it (7161)
On 03/20/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by bobthenun - United States (California)
Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36019) - you deserved it (7328)
On 03/10/2013 at 9:40am - intimacy - by cremyfrozentreat - United States (Florida)
Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30409) - you deserved it (2126)
On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I had to use a dictionary before I realized I was being flirted with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19348) - you deserved it (7467)
On 02/14/2013 at 6:01am - love - by lex - United States
Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25337) - you deserved it (3094) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8778) - you deserved it (22129)
On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada
Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21023) - you deserved it (2392)
On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed and spray me while singing the Spiderman theme song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15001) - you deserved it (3109)
On 09/29/2012 at 5:14am - intimacy - by BabyG2222 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19535) - you deserved it (1361)
On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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