Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

you_failed

Search for a member

you_failed

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9011
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About you_failed : Jen, my name is.

you_failed's page activity

Visits<b>feven</b> - 3 hours ago<b>jelrid</b> - 24 hours ago<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 6:26pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 7:31am<b>awkotaco333</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 6:10pm<b>CollinCrafts</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 12:31pm<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 12:26pm<b>mif</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:08pm<b>Rebekahxxx</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:22am<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:12pm<b>BearTheCrown</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:38am<b>zomk5g</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 10:26pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Shieldsam</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:57pm<b>mayamarble</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 6:04pm<b>pottergames</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 8:36am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 3:28pm

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 12:26am

you_failed's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of you_failed's badges

you_failed's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading in my apartment. Due to a heatwave and my lack of AC, I was completely naked. My cat jumped onto my lap, and as her claws dug into my stomach, I recoiled. This caused her to retreat, clawing at my nether regions in the process. My pussy mauled my pussy. FML

#20810087
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51359) - you deserved it (11691)

On 07/29/2013 at 5:18pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to help a bird who had broken his wing. I walked straight into a door while looking down at him in my hands, and ended up all but breaking his other wing. FML

#20809873
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40239) - you deserved it (12427)

On 07/29/2013 at 3:11pm - animals - by TehUglyLife (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried to help a bird who had broken his wing. I walked straight into a door while looking down at him in my hands, and ended up all but breaking his other wing. FML

#20809873
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40239) - you deserved it (12427)

On 07/29/2013 at 3:11pm - animals - by TehUglyLife (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40858) - you deserved it (27542)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40858) - you deserved it (27542)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40858) - you deserved it (27542)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

#20803453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44507) - you deserved it (8823)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

#20803453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44507) - you deserved it (8823)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

#20803453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44507) - you deserved it (8823)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

#20803453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44507) - you deserved it (8823)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, it was so hot in the un-airconditioned gym that when I got up off the floor, I slipped in my own pool of sweat and got a concussion. FML

#20800714
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42748) - you deserved it (4388)

On 07/24/2013 at 2:44am - health - by not_very_smart (woman) - United States

Today, it was so hot in the un-airconditioned gym that when I got up off the floor, I slipped in my own pool of sweat and got a concussion. FML

#20800714
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42748) - you deserved it (4388)

On 07/24/2013 at 2:44am - health - by not_very_smart (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the Giants game. During the seventh inning stretch they showed me on the jumbo-tron. It was just in time for the entire stadium to see me pull a tampon out of my purse. FML

#20799228
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60034) - you deserved it (7818)

On 07/23/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by GiantsFan13 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend got angry because I laughed when he asked me if he should retire from being a Pokemon Trainer. He was serious. He's also 21. FML

#20798065
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38484) - you deserved it (10615)

On 07/22/2013 at 6:14pm - love - by ihatepokemon (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend got angry because I laughed when he asked me if he should retire from being a Pokemon Trainer. He was serious. He's also 21. FML

#20798065
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38484) - you deserved it (10615)

On 07/22/2013 at 6:14pm - love - by ihatepokemon (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: