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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9185
  • Number of comments : 260
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About you_and_me : hey theree

i love talking so you can message me!!
pss. if i don't answer right away it's because i usually use the FML app! (:


you_and_me's page activity

Visits<b>chrisbeaudoin</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 12:34am<b>BinaryGuy</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 6:48pm<b>anonymoosegoast</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 8:22pm<b>MoisesCervantes</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 5:35pm<b>Chibster</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 3:25pm<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 2:37pm<b>christinascudder</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 5:02am<b>whatahatuis</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 7:13am<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 5:37pm<b>unknown312</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 9:37pm<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:04pm<b>jasonm27</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 5:21am<b>bigbrown24</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 1:23pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 4:58am<b>papashaan</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:50am<b>Brunofk7</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 8:33am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 10:09pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 10:39pm

Fucked!<b>anonymoosegoast</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 2:22am<b>taylorzgoines</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 5:14am<b>aclark2523</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 3:25am<b>jessiejamesp</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 7:21am<b>mydumblifesucks</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 6:36pm

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you_and_me's favorite FMLs

Today, I uploaded the first chapter of my best writing yet to a popular writing website. After ten minutes, I was thrilled to already see one review and five comments. Each comment was telling me to immediately delete the story because of how horrible it was. The rating was half a star. FML

by Apparently not a writer / 02/20/2013 at 11:36am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, as my lame excuse to not give a guy I met at a club my phone number, I told him I didn't have a cell phone. Guess what I checked when he asked me what time it was a few minutes later. FML

by hhhhhhhpeterwut / 02/18/2013 at 10:21pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

by Target / 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 12:13am / United States / Love

Today, I was rehearsing for a school play. My drama teacher keeps criticising the part where I fake-trip, saying I make it look terribly fake. During today's rehearsal, I actually tripped for real, and smashed my kneecaps against the floor with a scream. He still said my "acting" sucked. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 8:00pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

by kk / 01/09/2013 at 11:07am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, an intoxicated gentleman stumbled into my shop requesting alcohol, which I do not sell. When I informed him of this, he expressed his disappointment by urinating on the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2013 at 6:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

by Raela / 01/04/2013 at 11:59am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

by Bishop / 06/06/2012 at 10:19am / Transportation

Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML

by facepalm / 06/06/2012 at 4:06am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML

by 635CSi / 06/06/2012 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2012 at 5:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous