Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

yomommma

Search for a member

yomommma

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 788
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

yomommma's page activity

Visits<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 9:47am<b>Henriqu3e</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 5:16am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 2:39am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:15am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 11:40pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:47am<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:41pm<b>JonD63</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 10:57am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 4:00am<b>Jazzy9999</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 8:13pm<b>cokeman666</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 8:47am<b>Zz_I_Raditz</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 4:24am<b>FluffyHat</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 3:31pm<b>armylife316</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 3:35pm<b>mariannezr</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 1:24pm<b>FunkMasta</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 1:16pm<b>doc_emmet_brown</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:15pm<b>mickinly_lanae</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 5:23pm

yomommma's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of yomommma's badges

yomommma's favorite FMLs

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11428) - you deserved it (39272)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I walked around town by myself for four hours because I was too ashamed to tell my parents that I have no friends willing to spend time with me. FML

#19927213
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26068) - you deserved it (4062)

On 07/12/2012 at 6:31am - misc - by etmerda (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML

#19207829
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32267) - you deserved it (4917)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:23am - intimacy - by virginkiller (man) - Singapore

Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML

#19124149
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26313) - you deserved it (4059)

On 02/20/2012 at 4:19pm - intimacy - by Gavin - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning to one man, he stopped and looked at me from head to toe before smirking and saying, "Mmmm." He then turned around and said, "It's starting." It's only my first day. FML

#18912868
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21096) - you deserved it (2305)

On 01/25/2012 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the vibrator I ordered online was delivered. I'd paid extra to make sure it would be here before the weekend, so I could sneak it into my room while everyone was gone. My dad decided to stay home all day and answer the door ahead of me. FML

#18864460
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27418) - you deserved it (8282)

On 01/20/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Ouch (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

#18667019
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31390) - you deserved it (7622)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

#18626435
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42209) - you deserved it (8109)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my mother hacked my Facebook and broke up with my boyfriend and pretended to be me. She told him if he ever talks to me again, she'll call the cops. FML

#18518838
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34952) - you deserved it (3434)

On 12/15/2011 at 10:20am - love - by NinjaWafflesx (woman) - United States

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

#17628790
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (13141)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:02am - health - by Bigpoppa0507 - Canada

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

#17628790
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (13141)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:02am - health - by Bigpoppa0507 - Canada

Today, it was my first day on the job as a first grade teacher. One student pushed another, so I asked him to apologize. His response? "If you boss me around, I'll tell Daddy you touched me somewhere you shouldn't have." I think I'm now this kid's slave. FML

#17615072
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34799) - you deserved it (3376)

On 08/29/2011 at 7:59pm - kids - by slavelaborsux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother-in-law told my husband that I cannot stay in her house unless I can bring proof from a doctor that my allergy to cats is not contagious. FML

#17612876
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26535) - you deserved it (2111)

On 08/29/2011 at 2:47pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

#17612047
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12138) - you deserved it (52601)

On 08/29/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by slut (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30336) - you deserved it (3418)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: