xxsakuraxx

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xxsakuraxx

15Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5856
  • Number of comments : 215
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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xxsakuraxx's page activity

Visits<b>LycanGod</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 10:58pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:15pm<b>ShaneBarnes</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 2:11pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 5:53pm<b>deathrise007</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 1:38pm<b>Mons</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 2:42am<b>DerrickJames</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 4:12pm<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:51pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 5:26am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 4:47pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 3:56pm<b>george_s_4</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 7:00am<b>writergirl1029</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 4:17am<b>sinverguenza</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 9:02pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 10:13pm<b>Barskdyar</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 11:07pm<b>taybug1216</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 8:31am<b>1penguin</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 9:29pm

Fucked!<b>deathrise007</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 7:38pm<b>taybug1216</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 2:32pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:18pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 4:39am<b>Tenker</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 6:05am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:08pm<b>interesting33</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 5:34pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 5:10pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 8:05pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 7:08am<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 11:21pm<b>gopi</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 2:36pm<b>im_a_black_guy</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 9:59pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 9:10am

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xxsakuraxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so tired, I passed out at work in the middle of a call. All because my neighbor's car alarm kept going off every 3 minutes all through the morning. It was still going when I left for work. If you see a news story in a few days about a whole neighborhood beating a guy to death, that's probably us. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2016 at 9:00am / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, my husband and I both got smart watches. We were running around, acting like we were in a James Bond movie, having fun. Until our neighbors called the cops on us for hiding in their bushes. FML

by nykkymcallister / 05/18/2016 at 11:07pm / United States (Maryland) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't know much about the USA, and two, they now believe it's proper manners to shout, "FREEEEDOM" before ending a call with me. FML

by Chin... uh.... / 05/10/2016 at 6:42pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, while shopping, I told my wife I'd love some pork chops for dinner. Someone nearby muttered, "That's practically cannibalism, ya fat pig." My wife immediately had a "coughing attack" that sounded suspiciously like it was covering up laughter. FML

by dempasi / 05/06/2016 at 2:51pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter had a vocabulary assignment. She had to find five new words in books and movies. She was watching Shrek, so her first word was "thong". FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2016 at 8:33pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was hauling cow shit. I had a car following me very closely, so I turned on the spreader to get them to back off. It was a cop. I got pulled over in a tractor for spraying cow shit on a cop car. FML

by farmingman / 04/14/2016 at 7:24pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I went to Costco and the cashier asked me how I was doing so, to be nice, I asked her back. She said, "I'm fucking horrible, I'm working at Costco," nearly making me spit my drink out. FML

by sorkin15 / 03/24/2016 at 5:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, while at work I got a complaint from a guest. She complained that after spending 2 hours to get her hair done for a wedding, she got drenched with water from a child. I work at a WATER PARK. Thank you for calling me a pathetic asshat for no reason in front of other guests. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2016 at 6:46pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML

by humiliated / 03/20/2016 at 7:54am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, when my son gets mad in a store, he will scream stranger danger and run away from me, and to an employee, and ask for help. FML

by anonymous / 03/13/2016 at 3:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend is mad at me for causing him to fail a science test. Apparently he thought I was serious when I told him that homo sapiens were extinct because they were "homo". FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2016 at 2:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I worked such a long shift at Panera that when my boyfriend called later, I answered, "It's a fresh day at Panera Bread in [town], this is [name] speaking. How may I help you?" He thought it was hilarious. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2016 at 7:53pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, which he was happy about, until I told him in the interest of fair play he also had to let me fuck him with a strap on. It didn't take him very long to suddenly decide anal is disgusting, with all kinds of health risks. And he thinks he's the smart one. FML

by sandra / 02/04/2016 at 8:01pm / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, my dad and uncle got in an argument over money and ended up fighting in the back garden. Only, my dad is a muay thai fighter and my uncle is an MMA fighter, and they're refusing to stop until one of them is out cold. I foresee me driving them both to the hospital before midnight. FML

by enya / 01/18/2016 at 5:29pm / Luxembourg / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2016 at 1:41pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy