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About xxHaley2011xx : I love Eminem, hanging with friends, and playing basketball. I'll talk to whoever, so people should message me. (:
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Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4880) - you deserved it (2633)
On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17783) - you deserved it (4510)
On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
I agree, your life sucks (5748) - you deserved it (15468)
On 03/11/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out that the only two people I've had feelings for in years are both dating each other. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24696) - you deserved it (2485)
On 01/07/2012 at 2:47pm - love - by Forever Alone x2 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10319) - you deserved it (1980)
On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I love him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32245) - you deserved it (6424)
On 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by KrissyBearr - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I noticed that my girlfriend has a deeper voice than I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21796) - you deserved it (4226)
On 12/26/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Cary (man) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11065) - you deserved it (8107)
On 11/19/2011 at 3:05am - intimacy - by Tyler - United States
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12755) - you deserved it (55616)
On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30007) - you deserved it (8273)
On 04/04/2011 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by Abyssal (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, I posted a status on Facebook saying I was depressed and needed someone to talk to. Someone commented on it saying "Just kill yourself". It got 20 likes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29146) - you deserved it (10518)
On 01/15/2011 at 12:38am - misc - by Zmeilerr - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend purposely makes me cry because it makes him feel special. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25430) - you deserved it (3480)
On 12/31/2010 at 6:11am - love - by ohemmgeee (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I met my boyfriend's very strict and traditional Korean parents. I had to listen to them while they called me a skank and how I was fat and ugly compared to nice, pretty, Korean girls. They don't know I speak Korean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37066) - you deserved it (2115)
On 12/12/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)
Today, my 21 year old boyfriend asked me what foreplay is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21172) - you deserved it (3399)
On 12/12/2010 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend of one year told me not to walk beside him because people might "think we're together". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29535) - you deserved it (3600)
On 08/07/2010 at 2:06am - love - by WastedTime (woman) - United States (Ohio)
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