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xxBFMVAAMIWxx

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xxBFMVAAMIWxx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 February 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 286
  • Number of comments : 142
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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xxBFMVAAMIWxx's page activity

Visits<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - yesterday at 8:28pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 5:23am<b>ThaReaper319</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 10:54pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:25am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:30am<b>LivClaire96</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:30pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 7:29pm<b>Crusher74</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 9:57am<b>Brandon4312</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:45am<b>randomnameguy</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:06am<b>kathleengray</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 8:28am<b>isabellathompson</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:32pm<b>TriggerFinger7</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 12:53pm<b>Zemmiphobia</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 6:27pm<b>cazilly</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:51pm<b>Soulsbane96</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 10:40am<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:52am<b>MsMarti</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:34am

Liked!<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:23am

xxBFMVAAMIWxx's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of xxBFMVAAMIWxx's badges

xxBFMVAAMIWxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I was shopping, when a man pointed at me and said to his friend, "Her. She's the one." He replied, "Yes, she'll do fine." I'm scared. FML

Today, I was feeling really good about myself for running and walking everywhere so much so that I was out of breath and panting. Well, until I remembered that I was playing a video game and it was my character that was doing the running around that is. FML

#21063762
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17959) - you deserved it (39193)

On 02/17/2014 at 8:57pm - health - by Tomb Raider Wannabe (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a woman pushed a stroller in front of my car. Thinking I'd hit someone, I jumped out. Turns out it was a doll. The "woman" was a 14-year-old girl, claiming, "I did it for the Vine!" FML

#21058421
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49977) - you deserved it (3938)

On 02/12/2014 at 7:52pm - misc - by Parusu - United States (Florida)

Today, I was breast feeding my son. Out of nowhere, he bit my nipple hard, causing me to scream in pain. He giggled with my nipple still between his teeth. FML

Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML

#21033078
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48951) - you deserved it (9993)

On 01/19/2014 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56628) - you deserved it (5689)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46290) - you deserved it (8711)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a restaurant for her birthday. She had to go to the toilet while there, and when she came back, she was crying. When I asked why, she said "I'm on my period!" and sobbed loudly in front of everyone that we couldn't have birthday sex. FML

#21016986
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58427) - you deserved it (6228)

On 01/04/2014 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, feeling too lazy to cook dinner, I bought a bagged salad from a low-end store. I dumped the contents into a bowl; the first thing that fell out was a dead mouse. Bon appetit. FML

#21011242
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42456) - you deserved it (6195)

On 12/31/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

#20930479
334 comments

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47222) - you deserved it (4373)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873
415 comments

I agree, your life sucks (106357) - you deserved it (12439)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML

#6040097
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10834) - you deserved it (79754)

On 10/28/2009 at 2:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8940) - you deserved it (115129)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)



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