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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46825) - you deserved it (7159)
On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)
Today, I actually resorted to checking the newspaper obituaries to see where the deceased were employed, just so I can find a job opening. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28991) - you deserved it (3530)
On 06/30/2011 at 1:44pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9858) - you deserved it (43838)
On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14164) - you deserved it (27342)
On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30164) - you deserved it (24879)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38951) - you deserved it (7129)
On 03/10/2011 at 10:08am - intimacy - by Anon (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59842) - you deserved it (5172)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was at the nursing home I work at, and my boss asked me if I'm serious about my job, telling me that I've been acting strange and not working hard enough. She wants to drug test me. The real reason I'm not 100% is because I have a stomach ulcer from the stress of working there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18243) - you deserved it (1642)
On 01/06/2011 at 7:21am - work - by sick (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20525) - you deserved it (50204)
On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I woke up after taking a sleep pill for the first time. I started in on a number of chores including paying bills when I noticed a new charge on my online credit card bill from 1am. I bought $120 worth of meat from an infomercial. It's non-refundable. I'm vegetarian. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16837) - you deserved it (8069)
On 11/24/2009 at 7:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)
Today, in the shower, a dime fell on my foot. The only place it could have come from? One of my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24801) - you deserved it (60098)
On 06/23/2009 at 10:37pm - health - by FattyMcFatterson (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (128753) - you deserved it (6535)
On 04/17/2009 at 9:19pm - intimacy - by gringa_Peru (woman) - Peru (Lima)
Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31123) - you deserved it (100322)
On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (307151) - you deserved it (40936)
On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22602) - you deserved it (30977)
On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 20 May 2013
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