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xsaschax

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xsaschax

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 746
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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xsaschax's page activity

Visits<b>troutbum</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 11:21pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 4:08pm<b>Ducreaux</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 10:27pm<b>PalmusTreus</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 5:54pm<b>Mark_Johnson_15</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 2:45pm<b>trqskq</b> - the 09/01/2012 at 10:59am<b>polvorah</b> - the 07/20/2012 at 4:32pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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xsaschax's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried turning on my boyfriend by sending him naughty pictures and texts, describing in detail all the things I was going to do to him when we have the house to ourselves this weekend. He responded by quoting that crappy movie 'The Room', saying, "Oh hi doggie!" FML

#20904281
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35976) - you deserved it (6042)

On 10/02/2013 at 1:47am - intimacy - by fed up/turned off - United States (California)

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66697) - you deserved it (4059)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48704) - you deserved it (6366)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, "Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays." I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank you and left. FML

#20896706
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42402) - you deserved it (5581)

On 09/26/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by horriblefashionsense (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

#20887524
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50951) - you deserved it (4953)

On 09/19/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by monkey (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22165) - you deserved it (89016)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in French class we had to write love letters as an exercise. Since my boyfriend recently broke up with me by text message, I ended up writing a 20-sentence love letter in French to my cat. FML

#20878541
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42379) - you deserved it (3854)

On 09/12/2013 at 5:24pm - love - by Frenchie - United States (Illinois)

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56173) - you deserved it (9170)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

#20868509
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38932) - you deserved it (2891)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by down trodden (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I put scribbles, lines, shapes and random words on my calendar just to make it seem like I was busy. This isn't the first time. FML

#20867690
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28729) - you deserved it (7859)

On 09/04/2013 at 5:07pm - misc - by cherbear1000 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I took my laptop to I.T. to fix my internet. Only after I left did I realise my memory technique for remembering the stages of mitosis (Iraqi penis man anally transmits chlamydia) was left as a sticky note on my desktop. The guy definitely noticed. FML

#20867249
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32864) - you deserved it (10323)

On 09/04/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by interphaseprophasemetaphase (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

#20860571
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36403) - you deserved it (2967)

On 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

#20860215
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41704) - you deserved it (18473)

On 08/30/2013 at 10:44am - health - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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