xs4u

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Offline (the 05/21/2016 at 7:47pm)

xs4u

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 February 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14624
  • Number of comments : 169
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xs4u : Social media manager. Tech freak. Horror/science fiction/fantasy film/book buff. LOVE anime & a good laugh. ANDROID is the future.

xs4u's page activity

Visits<b>uhhitsmegan</b> - yesterday at 2:15pm<b>pwagner014</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:01am<b>FatedB</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:18am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 5:01pm<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:02am<b>alexissage</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 9:55pm<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 5:50pm<b>christian2234</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 4:09pm<b>Allennis44</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 6:26pm<b>joea21</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 5:47pm<b>907nispel</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 4:46pm<b>Sp4de</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 7:14am<b>magicdrummer47</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:12am<b>Gho5tk3y</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 3:45pm<b>Melix</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:18am<b>shaar</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 10:51am<b>ChefCook9001</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 12:32am

xs4u's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of xs4u's badges

xs4u's favorite FMLs

Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML

by Adoptee / 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Kids

Today, I saw my neighbor of twelve years at the grocery store. Being friendly, I went over to say hello. After I did, she responded by saying that she didn't know me but I look familiar. Finally, she remembered why I'm familiar saying that I look like the dorky guy from Two and a Half Men. FML

by Greig / 05/22/2011 at 8:18am / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, my crush and I were talking on the phone and we were really hitting it off. We got on the subject of sex and I told him I have a purity ring. Then he suddenly said he had to go and hang up. FML

by Cassie / 05/21/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, the only positive thing my ex boyfriend left me was my pregnancy test. FML

by Emma-Louise / 05/20/2011 at 3:46pm / Intimacy

Today, after searching for a job for over a year now, I finally got an interview. The pressure made me so nervous that I passed out in the middle of it. FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2011 at 1:58am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

by John / 05/19/2011 at 12:27am / Transportation

Today, I finally found out who has been hacking my email account to send dirty messages to my teacher. My dad. FML

by Charles / 05/18/2011 at 1:13pm / Norway (Akershus) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML

by nicknick2 / 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my phone company and had my text history pulled. Why? Because a few days ago my 4 year old daughter told me that, "Daddy has a wife and a girlfriend." Turns out she was right. FML

by Clueless / 05/14/2011 at 7:35pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my sister and I both got "good luck" cards from our aunt wishing us well on our exams. My sister's said "We know you will do well". Mine said "We will love you no matter what happens". FML

by simonjudy / 05/14/2011 at 4:09pm / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

by scalmon / 05/13/2011 at 1:08pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

by crazycat / 05/13/2011 at 12:23pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend sent out a mass text to everyone on her contact list. She's getting married in a month. I didn't propose to her. FML

by Whosthegroom / 05/12/2011 at 9:09pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I was riding my long board. A few feet from me an attractive girl was riding one too, in the same direction. We made eye contact right as I slammed into a light pole. She then fell because she was laughing so hard. FML

by TheNerd / 05/11/2011 at 10:01pm / United States (California) / Love