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xoxchelaxox08

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xoxchelaxox08
  • Town/Country : Herndon, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1149
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About xoxchelaxox08 : Not much to say about me. I like to party, but not excessively. I love The Sims. I also love my eclectus parrot, Ezio Auditore da Herndon. Im really bad at filling these out, and usually just type out random facts about myself.

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xoxchelaxox08's favorite FMLs

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

#15935332
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32925) - you deserved it (9363)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm - kids - by nomorexbox - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML

#15934305
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37594) - you deserved it (4306)

On 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by Scarlett - United States (Washington)

Today, it's hot and sunny, and a customer asked me how I was, I responded by saying "It's a hot sunny day. Who doesn't love the sun?" He responded by telling me he had just had three melanomas cut out. I guess I did find someone who doesn't like the sun. FML

#15933136
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18906) - you deserved it (3778)

On 04/26/2011 at 11:03am - health - by fifthtimesacharm -

Today, I woke up to find a parking ticket on my car. My car was in my driveway and the cop who wrote it is my ex-boyfriend. This is the third time. FML

#15914349
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35381) - you deserved it (4936)

On 04/25/2011 at 12:24am - misc - by neverdatingacopagain (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML

#15903380
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26968) - you deserved it (7539)

On 04/24/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML

#15896791
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27307) - you deserved it (18358)

On 04/23/2011 at 11:20am - kids - by parentof5 (man) - United States

Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking about the embarrassing things I've done. After they'd had a lengthly conversation, my girlfriend mentions "And he always farts during sex." FML

#15895306
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31387) - you deserved it (7767)

On 04/23/2011 at 4:37am - intimacy - by Sadman (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I went on my first official date I've been on since my divorce. Things were going great until he ordered his fourth 32oz beer; he got hammered and became a horny octopus. Oh, and he farted whiled trying to give me a goodnight kiss. FML

#15804497
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28476) - you deserved it (3286)

On 04/16/2011 at 4:39am - love - by Username - United States

Today, I gave myself a bloody nose while trying to show my brother how to use a yo-yo. FML

#15786077
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10593) - you deserved it (15515)

On 04/14/2011 at 6:12pm - health - by Omegared - United States

Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML

#15779610
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12313) - you deserved it (24235)

On 04/14/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by wowimscrewed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37822) - you deserved it (5076)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML

#15726248
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20396) - you deserved it (2640)

On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I returned home to find the key to my mailbox missing. I called the post office and was informed that a new key will cost me $15. I have no money, and my paycheck is in the mailbox. FML

#15636997
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26618) - you deserved it (3661)

On 04/04/2011 at 3:47pm - money - by DaisyMay (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was watching Animal Planet while babysitting my 4 year-old niece. A really cute baby bunny came on and I called her into the room, only for her to see it get killed by a Bald Eagle. Now she won't stop crying. FML

#15632766
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25064) - you deserved it (12344)

On 04/04/2011 at 6:13am - kids - by arbiter3 -

Today, I was at a grocery store with my 3 year old son. As I was picking a cereal out, an older man comes over and says, "You should have used condoms. What an ugly boy." FML

#15628215
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52658) - you deserved it (5336)

On 04/03/2011 at 10:47pm - kids - by ravenskater -



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