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xopher425

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xopher425

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 April 1975 (39 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1053
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xopher425 : Some days your life is fucked, some days you deserve it. But most of the time you deserve your fucked up life.

xopher425's page activity

Visits<b>rocker_chick23</b> - 18 hours ago<b>happyjesus</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 2:18am<b>12goldfish69</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:21pm<b>an3ph</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:04am<b>Mac_Alvy</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 10:08pm<b>Wormie14</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 2:23pm<b>SandyRae</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 7:04pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 1:22am<b>BBlah</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:42am<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:41am<b>cassiecassie559</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 5:29pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:19pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:08pm<b>Tim2415</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:40pm<b>davidpropert</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 10:35pm<b>poppppojs</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 8:03pm<b>thegreatericmoor</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:37am<b>Jurnee1011</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 7:05pm

xopher425's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of xopher425's badges

xopher425's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

#19455819
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29125) - you deserved it (19225)

On 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by CantPublish - United States (California)

Today, I went to family therapy because my mom wanted the family to be closer. When asked what her biggest disappointment was in life, she turned to me and said, "Having a gay son" then patted my hand, smiled, and said "No offense, honey." FML

#19416879
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38450) - you deserved it (6528)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:24am - misc - by Sadboy (man) - United States

Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML

#19406343
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7938) - you deserved it (36525)

On 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by woohoo420 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML

#18814672
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34831) - you deserved it (12243)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States

Today, I got into an argument with my wife over how she spends too much time with her gay best friend. Now she says that if I want to ever get intimate with her again, I'll have to let her watch as I give him a striptease. FML

#18806135
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34215) - you deserved it (9747)

On 01/14/2012 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19956) - you deserved it (39237)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15044) - you deserved it (40007)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32043) - you deserved it (15794)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31409) - you deserved it (3280)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML

#18254256
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26897) - you deserved it (15800)

On 11/15/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by yuck - United Kingdom (Bolton)

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26553) - you deserved it (4912)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

#17918241
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19901) - you deserved it (9993)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

#17742835
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31709) - you deserved it (5191)

On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85413) - you deserved it (13098)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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