hii im bri. my life is not fcked, and im happy about thaaat lol. kk ily byyyeee
Today, I went to the sandcastle contest at my local beach. While waiting in line for my hotdog, a man cut in front of me and demanded a cup of water. I called him a jack ass and was saying how people like him give us a bad reputation on the beach. I then see him running to his choking daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6805) - you totally deserved it (50173)
On 04/19/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by howembarrasing (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46641) - you totally deserved it (8335)
On 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39046) - you totally deserved it (11773)
On 04/14/2009 at 10:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my friends and I saw a movie. We sat in the balcony. Halfway during the movie we heard a commotion, thinking it was a group of unruly teenagers like us, we began to pelt the lower half of the theater with candy. We later learned that it was a man having a heart attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6130) - you totally deserved it (58352)
On 04/06/2009 at 10:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, driving some friends back from a party I said, "Did everyone see Lisa totally hanging off of Pat tonight?! It was hilarious!!". There was a long silence, then one of my friends said "...you know Lisa is in the car, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9130) - you totally deserved it (60513)
On 03/19/2009 at 11:41pm - misc - by StephD (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend at his college and when I walked into the dorm he was lying in his bed with another girl. When he saw me he simply said, "April Fool's!" It's March 19th. FML
I agree, your life sucks (94700) - you totally deserved it (4474)
On 03/19/2009 at 3:40am - intimacy - by cmerr (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was curling my eyelashes in my bathroom and while I was counting to 5 my brother flung open my door. I jumped and ended up ripping out all my eyelashes. Now I have to wait until they grow back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60589) - you totally deserved it (5031)
On 03/14/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by CPN (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was drunk at my nan's birthday party. My boyfriend texted me asking if I could go out, to which I replied "No, I'm at my nan's house." He then dumped me, calling me a 'cheating whore.' I was confused, until I realised I'd misspelt nan and said "No, I'm at my man's house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13768) - you totally deserved it (30218)
On 03/01/2009 at 9:20am - love - by Mandy (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I was sitting in class and I fell asleep during the lesson. I was wearing sweatpants and had an erection. My teacher came up to me and grabbed my penis. She thought it was my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (384669) - you totally deserved it (67369)
On 02/27/2009 at 2:52pm - intimacy - by jgondi1 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (487014) - you totally deserved it (30993)
On 02/09/2009 at 8:55pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20150) - you totally deserved it (6875)
On 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm - misc - by EpicFail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I tried to play with my Wii using the TV remote. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2541) - you totally deserved it (10177)
On 01/04/2009 at 10:57pm - misc - by Rush Snake - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancee: "I don't know what I'd do without you...". She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7706) - you totally deserved it (2143)
On 12/25/2008 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Nicos - France (Ile-de-France)
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