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xo_emily_xo

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xo_emily_xo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 November 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 34168
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

About xo_emily_xo : Hi♥I have great FMLs, but as you can tell, they NEVER (!) get published =(

Thanks for checking out my profile♥

xo_emily_xo's page activity

Visits<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 4:09am<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 12:53pm<b>Schminkyg6136</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 1:47am<b>domolovesyoshi</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 10:27pm<b>beastiness</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:29pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:48pm<b>nick2356</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 12:11am<b>LickitungJr</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 5:31pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 7:38pm<b>MRVOlivia</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 8:32pm<b>that_band_nerd</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 10:37pm<b>149967</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 6:04pm<b>zzzaman</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:33am<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 11:16am<b>Sammy342</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 11:16am<b>kjblack</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 12:56am<b>eggfactory</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 9:23am<b>Nannerz98</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 11:35pm

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xo_emily_xo's favorite FMLs

Today, I went with my fiancé to meet his parents. He was really sweet the whole way there, and once we got there he introduced me as 'the girl I'm going to marry'. His parents took one look at me and said, "Are you sure?" I laughed, because I thought they were joking. They weren't. FML

#4309429
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45148) - you deserved it (2745)

On 08/05/2009 at 2:17pm - love - by kelizabeth (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was talking with a close friend (who is a virgin) about why he did not want to have sex with a prostitute. He told me that "It's not nice to know that the girl you are having sex with has slept with half the country", he then added "That is exactly why I would not have sex with you". FML

#4307488
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16618) - you deserved it (59205)

On 08/05/2009 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by unlucky (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML

#4306475
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (115950) - you deserved it (4582)

On 08/05/2009 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was in the middle of an intense orgasm when we heard the panicky voice of his little sister saying there was an emergency downstairs. He jumped up and left to see what the matter was. The big emergency? The Wii remotes had dead batteries. FML

#4304989
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52592) - you deserved it (8518)

On 08/05/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by some_girl_19 (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was fired from my job at a local family-ran restaurant. The Reason? The owner's daughter has been stealing money from the register little by little and has blamed me for all the lost money. The boss is still convinced it's me, though, because his daughter would "never tell a lie". FML

#4297624
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46428) - you deserved it (2082)

On 08/05/2009 at 12:13am - money - by familydisaster (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was trying to give my girlfriend an orgasm. While doing so she was lying on her back. I asked her: "How do you like that, baby?". She responded by asking where I bought the false ceiling and spotlights as she thought it would look good in her flat. She got bored instead of excited. FML

#4286858
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35670) - you deserved it (16283)

On 08/04/2009 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Hopelesslover (man) - Malta

Today, I was working the lighting for a drama production. In the last scene, two characters realize they are in love and kiss, then the stage goes dark. I mixed up my settings, and instead of a blackout, flashing party lights started going off. 300 people turn around to stare at me. FML

#4285773
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15230) - you deserved it (34612)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:22pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML

#4285765
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46026) - you deserved it (6446)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:21pm - love - by Angry (woman) - United States

Today, I turned on my boyfriend's computer and saw pictures of all of my credit cards, front and back, and several of my parent's credit cards. I looked in his e-mail and found receipts for items which had been billed to me and delivered to him, including golf clubs and my birthday gift. FML

#4281912
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54943) - you deserved it (5757)

On 08/04/2009 at 1:31pm - misc - by Michelle - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date night down a dirt road to a field in the middle of nowhere. He packed some blankets, a bottle of wine, and some condoms. He didn't know the dirt road was actually a driveway until all of our clothes were off. FML

Today, I took my best friend out for a night in town, after he got dumped by his girlfriend recently. As we were walking around, we passed a group of hot women, a couple who were checking him out. Trying to be encouraging, I said "He's single!" and winked. One of the girls was his ex-girlfriend. FML

#4280491
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38007) - you deserved it (9183)

On 08/04/2009 at 12:15pm - love - by badbestfriend (man) - United States (California)

Today, while visiting family in the Czech Republic, I was told on two separate occasions that I looked like a Czech TV star. Flattered, I asked what the TV show was called. Turns out there's a Czech version of 'Ugly Betty'. FML

#4278303
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35805) - you deserved it (3125)

On 08/04/2009 at 9:19am - misc - by CzechMeOut (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my grandfather was counting all the grandchildren he had and saying how fortunate he was to have all of us. When I pointed out that he'd forgotten to count me, he turned and said "You're adopted, you don't count as a real grandchild" FML

#4277712
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83803) - you deserved it (3905)

On 08/04/2009 at 8:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a love poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said "shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

#4277493
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57938) - you deserved it (4169)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:27am - love - by jemma (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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