xo_emily_xo

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xo_emily_xo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 November 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 36021
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

About xo_emily_xo : Hi♥I have great FMLs, but as you can tell, they NEVER (!) get published =(

Thanks for checking out my profile♥

xo_emily_xo's page activity

Visits<b>jill97</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 5:44am<b>Mightyrif</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 8:45am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 12:59pm<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 7:03pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 8:21pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 9:31pm<b>JackHuason</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 5:24pm<b>Participation</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 6:47am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:33pm<b>NineeCat</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 3:02am<b>choochee02</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:50pm<b>dusthar</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:45pm<b>decoydualist</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 6:21am<b>moneymuffen</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 10:54am<b>JohnSapp</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 3:30pm<b>5secondsofvvifi</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:09pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 5:57pm<b>Nightmare_666</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 9:52am

xo_emily_xo's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

xo_emily_xo's favorite FMLs

Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML

by hornyloser770 / 02/28/2010 at 9:15pm / Love

Today, I hung out with the guy I've liked for the first time in 3 years. And when he left, I gave him a hug, he pushed me, I tripped, and hit my head into the wall. Then to save his embarassment, pushed me over onto the couch and pretended to rape me. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML

by ohdeargodthatswrong / 01/09/2010 at 8:25am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, my future father in law motorboated my breasts as I bent down to give him a hug goodbye. The rest of the family stood there laughing. This is what I'm marrying into? FML

by umm / 12/08/2009 at 3:35pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my neighbor has been watching my husband and I have sex for the 2 years we've been married. He slaps his sausage and smokes 5 cigarettes while he watches. FML

by niquey62307 / 12/07/2009 at 10:36pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, a woman evidently posted on a chat website asking for any young men to send pictures of their junk to her cell phone. Over 60 messages were sent, mostly by underage boys, most of them including the picture. Only problem. The number posted wasn't hers... It was mine. I'm a 21 year old guy. FML

by buckid310 / 11/03/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a man I met on Halloween. It appears that his mullet wasn't actually part of his costume. FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Montana) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my fifty-five year old uncle had taken my phone and texted my girlfriend saying "I'm his uncle, send tit pics." She did. FML

by whatthef / 11/02/2009 at 1:06pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML

by oh dear / 10/25/2009 at 5:06am / Kids

Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML

by Kimberly / 10/22/2009 at 8:26am / Miscellaneous

Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML

by LonelyHeart / 10/22/2009 at 8:09am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML

by uneek_3225 / 10/22/2009 at 1:53am / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, at work, my husband came in and brought me flowers and a card for our anniversary. I opened the card to find a condom. I ran over and closed the door and we immediately got at it in the middle of my office. Halfway through, I realized I have been laying on the intercom button. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2009 at 12:32pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, my roomate thought it would be funny to take pictures of my morning wood and put it up on Facebook for everyone to see. FML

by Crappit / 10/06/2009 at 9:53am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my fiancé was performing oral on me, when I heard him start making a "Waka waka waka waka" noise. He confessed to pretending to be Pacman. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2009 at 9:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy