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xneonlightsx

Offline (the 01/15/2016 at 10:51pm) | Search for a member

xneonlightsx

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 October 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1617
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xneonlightsx : 20/F/Canada

xneonlightsx's page activity

Visits<b>CourtneyDanielle</b> - the 04/10/2010 at 9:27pm

xneonlightsx's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of xneonlightsx's badges

xneonlightsx's favorite FMLs

Today, I sold my Xbox and Kinect to a guy. I forgot that sometimes I'd play Dance Central naked, and the Kinect would make videos. This guy now has videos of me, naked, badly dancing. FML

#18791715
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14423) - you deserved it (50070)

On 01/13/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that my vagina reminds him of ham. But that's okay, because ham is his favorite food. FML

#18704788
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (5355)

On 01/04/2012 at 7:32am - intimacy - by thankzbabe (woman) - United States

Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML

#18644636
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19420) - you deserved it (30185) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm - misc - by Kevin - France

Today, my girlfriend referred to her yeast infection as "making bread." I can never look at bread the same way. FML

#18623921
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27969) - you deserved it (3077)

On 12/27/2011 at 10:15am - health - by themuffinman (man) - Japan

Today, while sleeping, my foot was stabbed by something in my bed and I woke up to it bleeding. I looked around for the cause and found nothing. Now I'm afraid to go to sleep because it might happen again. FML

#18550931
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33126) - you deserved it (2658)

On 12/19/2011 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

#18136317
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28538) - you deserved it (10313)

On 11/02/2011 at 3:12am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

#18072283
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37332) - you deserved it (3089)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:04pm - kids - by mew - Canada

Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML

#18052574
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56199) - you deserved it (4393)

On 10/23/2011 at 7:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18755) - you deserved it (49498) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

#17821676
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14449) - you deserved it (80862)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by essay2 - United States (California)

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

#17779717
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60151) - you deserved it (5933)

On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at my job serving, I went to clear the plates when the guy said, "Hold on a second." Thinking he wasn't quite finished, I went to put the plate back. He then reached in to his mouth, pulled out a dark brown object and threw it on the plate. It was a rotten tooth. I almost puked. FML

#17749628
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33754) - you deserved it (2013)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:36am - work - by Tancred (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35539) - you deserved it (5890)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34289) - you deserved it (5060)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I picked off what I thought was a small bug feeding on my skin. I was wrong. It was a mole. I spent the last 30 minutes trying to stop the continuous bleeding. FML

#17514634
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26228) - you deserved it (10442)

On 08/18/2011 at 11:22pm - health - by c.hip - United States (California)



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