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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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xmaggerzz

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xmaggerzz
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  • Number of visits : 280
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I had a stressful day at work and decided to go in the jacuzzi. I hadn't used it for a year, so it was a little dirty. After I cleaned it, filled it up, and jumped in, I pressed the jets. Immediately, thousands of dead moths shot out at full speed towards me. FML

#4927406 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (43965) - you deserved it (9667)

On 08/30/2009 at 11:23am - misc - by mel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I swapped seats with someone on a ferry so she could sit next to her friend. Minutes later, a child sitting behind me threw up on my head, while the girl I had swapped with and her friend laughed hysterically as I attempted to wipe the puke from my hair. FML

#4900941 (79)

I agree, your life sucks (37935) - you deserved it (2447)

On 08/29/2009 at 4:48am - kids - by littlemisstiny (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481 (409)

I agree, your life sucks (52116) - you deserved it (11878)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I wanted to be creative. I hid an engagement ring for my girlfriend inside one of her running shoes. I expected her to find it and wake me up, but she didn't. Later, when I asked if there was anything in her shoe, she responded, "There was a rock. I just shook it out outside. Why?" FML

#4880927 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (17333) - you deserved it (38789)

On 08/28/2009 at 11:08am - love - by fmlll (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to the doctor about my bruised runners toes. She was inexperienced when It came to athletic injuries, so she googled my condition. I just paid to have her tell me exactly what I had already just googled before I left for my appointment. FML

#4879906 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (32654) - you deserved it (3025)

On 08/28/2009 at 9:30am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while at an amusement park my husband left me to walk with all of our friends because he said that I moved too slow. I'm pregnant. FML

#4835763 (197)

I agree, your life sucks (43451) - you deserved it (4093)

On 08/26/2009 at 1:08pm - love - by lilbit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous co-worker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added the color was fitting perfectly with my acne... I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML

#4835743 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (34800) - you deserved it (2154)

On 08/26/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by 1nfected (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that the horrific smell coming from somewhere in my kitchen was a rotting dead mouse in my dishwasher. I have been eating off plates washed in dead-mouse water for the past week. FML

#4830976 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (44468) - you deserved it (7663)

On 08/26/2009 at 4:44am - misc - by hantavirus (woman) - United States (Oregon)