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I agree, their lives suck
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Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40881) - you deserved it (5331)
On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, the girl that I've been madly in love with was demanding I tell her who I liked. I told her no, I should just keep it a secret, but she demanded I tell her. After I told her, the only response I got was, "You're right. You should have kept that a secret." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54731) - you deserved it (4853)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:49am - love - by walkingdead_1029 - United States (Arizona)
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55564) - you deserved it (4766)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, my dad called me a "deadbeat loser" after I came back from my first day of voluntary rehab for my meth problem. He's never had a job in his life and sits on the sofa all day, smoking weed and playing video games, all on my mom's salary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48343) - you deserved it (6733)
On 05/05/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45467) - you deserved it (3691)
On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57659) - you deserved it (8154)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boss fired me for acting "inappropriately" at work. I gave him a hug. He's my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57460) - you deserved it (6637)
On 05/03/2013 at 11:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I wanted revenge on my college's drinks machine. For the past two days, it forgot to release a cup before pouring my coffee. This time, I had planned ahead; I put my money in, entered the code, and quickly inserted my own cup. It gave me hot water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39130) - you deserved it (4470) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was tutoring a band member. Whenever I ask him to play a D or any D scale, he stops just to snicker and say, "Ha ha. D." He still sucks. I hate his guts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32916) - you deserved it (4556)
On 04/25/2013 at 3:55am - work - by justgivemethed - United States (California)
Today, my new landlord and lettings agent made an illegal entry into my house. Unfortunately, at the time my boyfriend was buck naked, smoking a joint on the sofa, surrounded by the cats we aren't supposed to have. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25977) - you deserved it (37688)
On 04/25/2013 at 2:28am - misc - by goingtobeevicted - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, while grocery shopping, I was having such terrible abdominal pains I could hardly walk. As I'm 8 months pregnant, I told my husband we should head home. He thought a better idea was to run through the store and hide from me, hoping to induce labor by making me chase him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41655) - you deserved it (3244)
On 04/24/2013 at 8:18pm - misc - by pregz (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47488) - you deserved it (2971)
On 04/24/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by awkward O_o - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43583) - you deserved it (5011)
On 04/23/2013 at 7:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66270) - you deserved it (8128)
On 04/23/2013 at 2:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42918) - you deserved it (5435)
On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand
Monday 20 May 2013
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