xemmy

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xemmy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1993
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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xemmy's page activity

Visits<b>kak_999999999</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 3:29pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:37pm<b>Lil_Ms_Trble</b> - the 07/04/2009 at 7:27am<b>5PoPpIn6DrOpPiN</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 9:21am<b>Vandal</b> - the 05/15/2009 at 12:32am

xemmy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

xemmy's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML

by Anon / 10/03/2009 at 7:43am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML

by Sir Smokalot / 09/24/2009 at 4:05am / Love

Today, I was checking into a hotel with my boyfriend. A few minutes after we get to our room, the cops show up to our door asking to see some ID from the both of us. The hotel staff had called the cops on us because they thought I was underage and he was going to molest me. I'm 21 and he is 24. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2009 at 7:36pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I finally told my fiancé about the crippling sexual abuse I suffered through as a child. He immediately broke off the wedding. His reason? He can't marry someone who isn't "pure". FML

by Jackie / 09/17/2009 at 9:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me. Why? Our one month old's hair is growing in blonde, and we both have dark hair. Did I cheat? No. I had blonde hair as a child until I was 4... As did every one else born in my family. I guess this factor doesn't count when you're paranoid. FML

by babymomma / 09/14/2009 at 10:13am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was at my boyfriends house, meeting his family for the first time. We were all standing in the kitchen when suddenly a small white and brown mouse ran by. As a natural instinct, I stomped on it. Turns out, it was his little sister's pet mouse that had gotten out of its cage earlier. FML

by JustMyLuck / 09/05/2009 at 9:31pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking home from work going over a railway-bridge, when a 12 year old boy standing at the bottom asks if I could help him carry his bike up, as he couldn't lift it. I did it for him, and was greeted on the other side by his father - who thought I was stealing it and hit me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2009 at 7:43pm / United Kingdom (London) / Kids

Today, a customer came in who only spoke Spanish. I speak Spanish rather well so I helped the customer. She ended up buying $2300 worth of stuff. I got written up because not speaking English apparently "has the potential be offensive to other customers if they are not able to understand you". FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2009 at 12:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me to come to her college, so I did. I was greeted by the campus police who told me to stop harassing her because she no longer wants to be with me. Then they told me I was no longer welcome on campus and hereby banned. She used campus police to dump me. FML

by Wow / 09/03/2009 at 9:45pm / United States / Love

Today, I was walking through my house when I saw a strange man sitting on my couch. I asked him who he was and he said he was a friend of my mom's. He told me to join him and when I sat down, he punched me in the face and stole my cell phone, wallet, and car keys. FML

by robbed / 09/03/2009 at 3:09pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I awakened from my peaceful slumber in a great mood. I walked into my closet, ready to pick out an outfit for the day, to find my two year old daughter, kneeling on the floor with a pair of scissors in her hand, cutting up my wedding dress - my wedding is tomorrow. FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2009 at 1:05pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Kids

Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML

by NotCuteEnough / 08/24/2009 at 5:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

by ShiriSarah / 08/20/2009 at 10:39am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

by anonymous / 08/20/2009 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents decided to visit me. When I first got my apartment I gave them a key "just in case" and today they used this key to enter when I didn't answer their knocking. I didn't answer because I was having sex with my boyfriend. My parents saw everything. They didn't know I was gay. FML

by gorgeousrenthead / 08/10/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.