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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 27 September 1983 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2758
  • Number of comments : 379
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About xcarxcrashx : You don't actually care.

Wherever you go take a look at your feet; down six feet deep there's dead mans bones, bones BONES BONES BONES BONES!!

xcarxcrashx's page activity

Visits<b>Srxjo</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 1:14pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 6:51pm<b>EevieBear</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 5:12pm<b>epicgamer</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 8:07pm<b>nikkibodnarchuk</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 11:28pm<b>weird_adult</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 2:56am<b>Emmalyne606777</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 9:15am<b>ballsacks33</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:00pm<b>itss_emmaa</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:38am<b>Elban</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:19pm<b>fringeisawesome</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 9:05am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 11:05am<b>izkiz</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 2:37pm<b>peceout</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 12:19am<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 11:09am<b>adamant84</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:52pm<b>wafflewolf</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:55pm<b>XOLucy_21XO</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:16am

Fucked!<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 8:14pm

xcarxcrashx's FML badges


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xcarxcrashx's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend again accused me of cheating on him. This time, it was because I delayed replying to his text message so I could feed my pet. Apparently I'm fucking my pet toad now. Jesus. FML

by youre dumped shitforbrain / 08/19/2012 at 12:52pm / Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan) / Love

Today, I was doing my laundry and I saw a dollar bill at the bottom of the washer. I excitedly dove in to retrieve the money, and promptly hit and broke my nose on the washer. FML

by Megan / 08/17/2012 at 3:30am / United States (Arkansas) / Money

Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said "nah, it's just a generic face". FML

by Anonymous / 08/15/2012 at 1:41pm / United States / Love

Today, I went to a movie with this guy. He was late so the only seats available were the ones in the very front which he refused to sit in. As we were looking for two seats, he spotted one near the back and sat down, leaving me to sit by myself in the front. FML

by BC94 / 07/16/2012 at 12:21am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter. The comforter was mine. FML

by Sherry / 07/11/2012 at 9:29am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, while I was walking home alone, a homeless man approached me and took me by the hand. Apparently, he's been watching me for weeks and has fallen madly in love with me. He told me not to worry, though; he's not a rapist. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2012 at 12:43pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a nude picture of my girlfriend. Once I looked at it my morning wood went away. FML

by bob / 07/03/2012 at 1:33pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I had my end of year physics exam. I wasn't sure about some stuff, so I hid my notes and textbook in the bathroom. Halfway through, I got up, went to the bathroom, and as soon as I picked up the book, forgot what I was looking for. I can't even cheat right. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2012 at 3:23am / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a graduation gift: a new boyfriend. FML

by TheAngryBird / 06/28/2012 at 12:51am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I've been in love with for three years. Her response was to well up, start crying, and ask me why I had to have chosen her. FML

by Oraashi / 06/26/2012 at 1:18pm / United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent) / Love

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

by anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 10:09am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

by megasniper240 / 06/19/2012 at 11:35am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my sister called me and asked if my boyfriend of 3 years had proposed to me yet. And now the surprise is ruined. FML

by anonymous / 06/16/2012 at 9:57am / United States / Love

Today, all my guy friends kept hugging me tightly and then softly and then tightly again. I later found out they just wanted to feel my boobs on their chests. FML

by a chick in California / 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy