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xcarlito615x

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xcarlito615x

17Fucked!

xcarlito615xxcarlito615x
  • Town/Country : Flushing, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6268
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About xcarlito615x : "He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes,

started making his way past two in the morning,

He hasn't been sober for days,

leaning now

into the breeze remembering sunday he falls to his knees..."

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 9:10pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 8:46pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:48pm<b>superuser1234</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 6:38pm<b>iAlissa</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 7:51pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 9:53pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 10:18am<b>LadyDeath18</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:54pm<b>neneluvsyooh</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 1:26am<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 2:18pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 10:46pm<b>unlucky_lucy</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 2:26pm<b>PixelKat</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 2:58pm<b>HeartYou101</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 1:19pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 8:41am<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 11:05pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:55am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:43pm

Fucked!<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:43pm<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:47am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:44am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 3:45am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:17am<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:57pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:25pm<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:16am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:18am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:13am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:15pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:50am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:00am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:07am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:44am<b>tashb</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:30pm

xcarlito615x's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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Inception

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See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

#19450302
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (37078)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

#19449601
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34641) - you deserved it (5541)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

#19449472
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15914) - you deserved it (40078)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by erockinthesuburb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while running in the park, I noticed some ducks in a pond. I stopped to look at them and began quacking at them, to see if they would react. This would have been OK had I not been wearing ear-buds, blasting music, making me unable to realize just how loud I was quacking. With people all around. FML

#19449312
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8817) - you deserved it (35295)

On 04/11/2012 at 11:39am - animals - by Quackers (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML

#19406628
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14415) - you deserved it (32761)

On 04/04/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML

#19339659
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8791) - you deserved it (27998)

On 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Avery - United States (California)

Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML

#19319000
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35254) - you deserved it (10676)

On 03/21/2012 at 3:27am - intimacy - by ReallyBro (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML

#19293533
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38102) - you deserved it (10030)

On 03/17/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by noneedtostress - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was shaving naked in my cold bathroom before showering. My wife walked up behind me, yelled "Shrinkage!" and flicked the head of my penis as hard as she could. FML

#19261628
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (4504)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

#19211804
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43886) - you deserved it (30036)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19396) - you deserved it (32765)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went to an extended family reunion. I started chatting to my great grandpa, and he asked me what I do for a living. Before I could tell him I breed animals, my visibly drunk dad interrupted and slurred, "Oh, she jacks things off. Horses, pigs, just about anything, really." FML

#19102316
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30116) - you deserved it (3874)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:13pm - intimacy - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he put me through so much heartache last year was because the make-up sex was awesome. FML

#19071963
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32257) - you deserved it (5019)

On 02/14/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by makeupsex (woman) - Canada

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

#19064063
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36323) - you deserved it (6737)

On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML

#19053035
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30408) - you deserved it (8192)

On 02/11/2012 at 11:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



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