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xcarlito615x

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xcarlito615x

17Fucked!

xcarlito615xxcarlito615x
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5420
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About xcarlito615x : "He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes,

started making his way past two in the morning,

He hasn't been sober for days,

leaning now

into the breeze remembering sunday he falls to his knees..."

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>melisssa87</b> - 2 hours ago<b>hallieee</b> - 12 hours ago<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:55am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:43pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 5:28pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:20pm<b>hard_candy</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 4:59am<b>JoyAda</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:28am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 11:43pm<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 9:44pm<b>felipe2342</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 12:28pm<b>AkBunny907</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 8:09pm<b>Bobegan</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:29pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 7:27pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 6:43pm<b>Shipley18</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 4:10pm<b>Enderkate4</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:00am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:16pm

Fucked!<b>melisssa87</b> - just now<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:47am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:44am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 3:45am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:17am<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:57pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:25pm<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:16am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:18am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:13am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:15pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:50am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:00am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:07am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:44am<b>tashb</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:30pm

xcarlito615x's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26261) - you deserved it (3017)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32246) - you deserved it (7674)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

#20018901
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29462) - you deserved it (1860)

On 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm - misc - by jannister (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

#20003323
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30619) - you deserved it (6233)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

#19995362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25249) - you deserved it (1613)

On 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm - work - by kaitlyna15 - United States (Washington)

Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML

#19994389
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8063) - you deserved it (46790)

On 07/31/2012 at 11:53am - love - by TheMissMuffly (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had my eyebrows waxed for my senior pictures. After manhandling me, the cosmetologist managed to "accidentally" take my whole eyebrow off. It looks like I'll be remembered forevermore as the girl with one eyebrow. FML

#19987412
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21053) - you deserved it (2808)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:46pm - misc - by booo - United States (Nevada)

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

#19983177
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (3328)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML

#19908128
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34090) - you deserved it (1603)

On 07/08/2012 at 2:58am - misc - by JadedBaker (woman) - United States

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39558) - you deserved it (9510)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went for a jog. I was 5 km away from home when I had a sudden urge to poop. I didn't want to use the bushes, so I thought I could hold it in. I was wrong. FML

#19890134
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23997) - you deserved it (5404)

On 07/04/2012 at 9:48am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

#19871781
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6635) - you deserved it (20942)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by rs (woman) - Egypt

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML

#19829657
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8287) - you deserved it (25178)

On 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by hakura madada - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML

#19827814
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25611) - you deserved it (3458)

On 06/22/2012 at 3:28am - work - by me - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML

#19826088
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6851) - you deserved it (33866)

On 06/21/2012 at 9:28pm - love - by a stupid jackass (man) - United States (New York)



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