Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

xcarlito615x

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

xcarlito615x

17Fucked!

xcarlito615xxcarlito615x
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5426
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About xcarlito615x : "He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes,

started making his way past two in the morning,

He hasn't been sober for days,

leaning now

into the breeze remembering sunday he falls to his knees..."

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>unlucky_lucy</b> - yesterday at 5:12am<b>HeartYou101</b> - yesterday at 1:19pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - yesterday at 1:07pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 8:41am<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 11:05pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:55am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:43pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 5:28pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:20pm<b>hard_candy</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 4:59am<b>JoyAda</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:28am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 11:43pm<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 9:44pm<b>felipe2342</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 12:28pm<b>AkBunny907</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 8:09pm<b>Bobegan</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:29pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 7:27pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 6:43pm

Fucked!<b>melisssa87</b> - yesterday at 2:43pm<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:47am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:44am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 3:45am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:17am<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:57pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:25pm<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:16am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:18am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:13am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:15pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:50am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:00am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:07am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:44am<b>tashb</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:30pm

xcarlito615x's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48914) - you deserved it (19614)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69119) - you deserved it (8120)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

#20745866
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52054) - you deserved it (9095)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML

#20745688
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53551) - you deserved it (14677)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by dan (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to stay out of our apartment. About half-way through, my roomate blared "The Eye of the Tiger" from the other side of the door. My girlfriend laughed so hard that we couldn't finish. FML

#20733192
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60199) - you deserved it (8411)

On 06/18/2013 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was my first time with my boyfriend, at his house, in his Dora the Explorer sheets. FML

#20550446
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41015) - you deserved it (8735) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/18/2013 at 6:34pm - love - by inconnue - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

#20465889
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60621) - you deserved it (6963)

On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML

#20125076
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11045) - you deserved it (35287)

On 10/20/2012 at 9:57am - intimacy - by MIND BLOWING - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML

#20119263
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27741) - you deserved it (2763)

On 10/16/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by Mike - United States



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: