xcarlito615x

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Offline (the 05/15/2016 at 8:32pm)

xcarlito615x

19Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Flushing, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7286
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About xcarlito615x : .

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>missa8604</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 10:42pm<b>lulubelles</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 10:19am<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 11:57am<b>yellow33</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 11:28pm<b>captredd</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 4:09am<b>agostina_mc</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 10:05pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 1:13pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 4:54pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 3:15pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 5:46am<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:51pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 2:00pm<b>zBerryz</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 8:24am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 12:41am<b>hallieee</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 7:42pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 3:01pm<b>Avi8r</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 1:31pm<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 9:10pm

Fucked!<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 5:57pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 11:43pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:43pm<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:47am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:44am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 3:45am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:17am<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:57pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:25pm<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:16am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:18am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:13am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:15pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:50am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:00am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:07am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:44am

xcarlito615x's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

by flavored / 11/18/2013 at 10:26am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, "Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays." I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank you and left. FML

by horriblefashionsense / 09/26/2013 at 11:20am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the nice guy who comes to my workplace every morning to bring me a smoothie also makes a point of putting his knob in it before giving it to me. Also, all my coworkers knew about this and think it's hilarious. FML

by littledipper / 09/24/2013 at 11:51pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2013 at 1:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

by Grand Slam / 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a suicide prevention walk with a girl I like. Before the walk, we bought balloons to set free when they called the names of the deceased. To buy a balloon, you had to write a name on a sheet. Apparently, you weren't supposed to write your own. They called my name. FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2013 at 7:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

by NotGabe / 09/01/2013 at 10:25am / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend and I are on camping vacation. On my way out of the tent, I stepped in a pile of shit. When I told him, he said, "Oh, I couldn't make it to the bathroom last night." The bathroom was a minute walk from our tent. FML

by justash12 / 08/25/2013 at 5:13am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2013 at 2:11pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML

by ass slap / 08/11/2013 at 11:35am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

by Oh-Shit! / 08/10/2013 at 11:23am / United States / Health

Today, my new husband and I were called up to have our first dance at our wedding. While I rested my head on his shoulder, he whispered the most romantic thing to me: "Your breath stinks." FML

by fml / 08/10/2013 at 6:48am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I went to my boss's dinner party. My sister, who also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kicked her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's baby crawling under the table. FML

by offuckingcourse / 08/06/2013 at 1:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and my eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stopped, and I was thrilled because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stopped to order a cheeseburger. FML

by mcdonalds / 08/06/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Health

Today, I stepped out of the house for some fresh air. It was still dark out, so imagine my horror when I accidentally stepped on a frog. It squealed for a split second before being crushed beneath my uncovered foot. FML

by traumatizedforlife / 08/05/2013 at 4:21pm / United States / Animals