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xcarlito615x

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xcarlito615x

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2324
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About xcarlito615x : kik:
xxblowmymindxx

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>Kayjose</b> - 14 hours ago<b>nataliewby</b> - 22 hours ago<b>umerin</b> - yesterday at 2:44am<b>summer135790</b> - yesterday at 10:42pm<b>cjtm98</b> - yesterday at 8:55pm<b>DocBastard</b> - yesterday at 5:36pm<b>isaac_llama01</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:32am<b>emmabear1995</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 10:47am<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 11:29pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 5:05pm<b>RedNinjaTurtle</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:31pm<b>sadbubbles</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:07pm<b>Anae23</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 9:28pm<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:02pm<b>awkwardmess</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:51am<b>gis0392</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:29am<b>weirdly_cute</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:12am<b>MattBenid</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:23am

xcarlito615x's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56353) - you deserved it (6675)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

#20777221
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55542) - you deserved it (4332)

On 07/12/2013 at 3:22am - misc - by ouch (man) - United States

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

#20772281
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51522) - you deserved it (20763)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54924) - you deserved it (7744)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46755) - you deserved it (18762)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66965) - you deserved it (7898)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

#20745866
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49368) - you deserved it (8735)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML

#20745688
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50133) - you deserved it (13809)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by dan (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to stay out of our apartment. About half-way through, my roomate blared "The Eye of the Tiger" from the other side of the door. My girlfriend laughed so hard that we couldn't finish. FML

#20733192
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56874) - you deserved it (7987)

On 06/18/2013 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was my first time with my boyfriend, at his house, in his Dora the Explorer sheets. FML

#20550446
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38211) - you deserved it (8316) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/18/2013 at 6:34pm - love - by inconnue - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

#20465889
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59304) - you deserved it (6830)

On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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