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xcarlito615x

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

xcarlito615x

13Fucked!

xcarlito615xxcarlito615x
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5298
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About xcarlito615x : "He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes,

started making his way past two in the morning,

He hasn't been sober for days,

leaning now

into the breeze remembering sunday he falls to his knees..."

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>Bobegan</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:29pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 9:03pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 7:27pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 6:43pm<b>Shipley18</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 4:10pm<b>Enderkate4</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:00am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:16pm<b>NeyNeyDaDa</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 4:54pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:20pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 4:30pm<b>queensassygoat</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 4:54pm<b>alyssaamarante</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:40pm<b>gunnerette</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 5:55pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:03am<b>idxntgiveafxck</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:12pm<b>perfect_heart13</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:03pm<b>gigistar15</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 2:30pm<b>killer0689</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 9:31am

Fucked!<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:17am<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:57pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:25pm<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:16am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:18am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:13am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:15pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:50am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:00am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:07am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:44am<b>tashb</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:30pm

xcarlito615x's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to sit through an entire conversation where my sister and her boyfriend sent voice messages to one another, of their farts. FML

#21449629
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19464) - you deserved it (1646)

On 07/30/2015 at 6:04pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. All the magic vanished when I kept queefing every time he thrust into me. We made it about 10 seconds before he broke down into hysterical laughter and lost his boner. FML

#21436148
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28080) - you deserved it (3718)

On 07/04/2015 at 1:02am - intimacy - by alison (woman) - United States

Today, I decided I wanted to bleach my hair, so I asked my mother for help. Apparently, something went wrong, because clumps of my hair started falling out. Now I'm half blonde and half bald, and my mom is just laughing at me. FML

#21436042
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22438) - you deserved it (5812)

On 07/03/2015 at 8:54pm - misc - by notquitejuliet - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31756) - you deserved it (2302)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

#21420039
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29464) - you deserved it (3954)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

#21419654
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23881) - you deserved it (4594)

On 06/02/2015 at 11:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

#21346279
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29978) - you deserved it (13193)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38413) - you deserved it (6059)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, after we had sex, my boyfriend told me how my orgasms used to make him think I was having a seizure. FML

#21327166
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30340) - you deserved it (3903)

On 12/30/2014 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by GladYoureConcerned (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41519) - you deserved it (4361)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50693) - you deserved it (14273)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35900) - you deserved it (56545)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML

#21139954
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46367) - you deserved it (6796)

On 05/14/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by oh god. - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

#21139495
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46997) - you deserved it (10665)

On 05/14/2014 at 9:12am - health - by thanks4support - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54796) - you deserved it (19860)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)



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