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xcarlito615x

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xcarlito615x

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xcarlito615x
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2771
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About xcarlito615x : "We accept the love we think we deserve"
- perks of being a wallflower

"You know what sucks? Realizing everything you believed in was complete and utter bullshit"
- 500 days of summer

I'm a hopeless romantic looking for an interesting conversation lol


kik:
xxblowmymindxx

xcarlito615x's page activity

Visits<b>xx_ginny</b> - 21 hours ago<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:52pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 11:59am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 8:47pm<b>feeshcake</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 12:30am<b>randomgirl1234</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 4:58pm<b>DianaFrances411</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 1:08pm<b>DriAA7</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 12:44pm<b>meowimmakat</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 12:53am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:25pm<b>FrutLoopDingus</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:37am<b>BloodFox95</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:35am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:00am<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 4:30am<b>ihatemymflife</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 12:13am<b>DubiousDude69</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 10:55pm<b>Kaneki</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 7:05pm<b>Brinibaby13</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 6:24pm

Liked!<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:07am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:44am<b>tashb</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:30pm

xcarlito615x's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of xcarlito615x's badges

xcarlito615x's favorite FMLs

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41201) - you deserved it (4338)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50458) - you deserved it (14222)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32784) - you deserved it (52519)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML

#21139954
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44145) - you deserved it (6515)

On 05/14/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by oh god. - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

#21139495
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46527) - you deserved it (10541)

On 05/14/2014 at 9:12am - health - by thanks4support - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52028) - you deserved it (19030)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

#21101391
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45145) - you deserved it (33403)

On 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, frustrated that my boyfriend never gives me any orgasms when we make love, I tried politely hinting that he needs to improve. To start with, I said maybe he should be more spontaneous in bed. He replied, "What, like putting it in your ass? Gotcha." Great. FML

#21074161
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47580) - you deserved it (14335)

On 02/28/2014 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

#21069326
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50652) - you deserved it (6691)

On 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

#21058991
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47196) - you deserved it (17113)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:20am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML

#21056453
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20555) - you deserved it (38609)

On 02/10/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

#21054451
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48608) - you deserved it (9546)

On 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

#21046118
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58934) - you deserved it (11437)

On 01/31/2014 at 10:29am - intimacy - by wtfjusthappened - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49818) - you deserved it (6244)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

#21044466
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49001) - you deserved it (21573)

On 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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