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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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xX_a_l_i_a_s_Xx
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Today, at work my arms were full. I needed to get the door open, so instead of pushing the swing door open with my shoulder, I kicked it open with my foot. Right into my manager's face. FML

#2647799 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (27545) - you deserved it (8104)

On 06/05/2009 at 11:36pm - work - by hellogoodbye (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the fire department chief stopped me as I was walking home from school and asked me where the fire was. When I looked at him blankly, he said I had been waving my hands around like an idiot. I then had to explain that I had been dancing to a song on my ipod. FML

#1442621 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (11665) - you deserved it (33701)

On 04/28/2009 at 11:07pm - misc - by Moe (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I used an airplane bathroom. I used a paper seat cover because I didn't want my butt to touch the seat. The seat cover clogged the toilet. I stuck my hand in and fished the seat cover out. I essentially stuck my hand into an airplane toilet because I didn't want my ass to touch the seat. FML

#1186504 (99)

I agree, your life sucks (9544) - you deserved it (50763)

On 04/21/2009 at 5:30am - misc - by Jen (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut M&M's at work when I exclaimed "oh cool they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes but I did eventually realize that I was looking at a regular M&M sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers uncontrollable laughter. FML

#1023184 (154)

I agree, your life sucks (9171) - you deserved it (53386)

On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was on a webcam with my friend. We were joking around so I stood up and flashed her. Her grandma choose that second to walk past and look at the screen. Her grandma now thinks were lesbians and that I'm a whore. FML

#416306 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (15771) - you deserved it (53608)

On 03/17/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by webcammistake (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I fell asleep in my driver's ed class, and I woke up in a middle of a dream laughing. Everyone stared at me. I found out that the teacher had just finished talking about his vegetative niece who didn't wear a seat belt. FML

#43148 (25)

I agree, your life sucks (10480) - you deserved it (23634)

On 02/14/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by Biggest Jerk (man) - United States (Ohio)