Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About xXDubbleChic : im pretty insane! Im out of my mind because its dark and scary in there! the people in my head ar british! and i talk to them a lot. people ask why i talk to myself and i tell them that im not. I also play XBoxLIVE and HATE it wen chicks complain that their boyfriend spend more time on it then her. Learn to play! I LOVE TACOS!I can eat a whole box of Friut Bars in less than a day. I suggest u try em'
For no reason AT ALL I love Canada. Tho I'd never live there. Well I'm bisexual and think that any girl can become beautiful with a little help. Well almost. O.o
PS i made this account for myself but my cousin(scene girl with stick figure) ending up having it but she finally got her own so ya. Different person.
PSS. I LOVE YOU... even though i dont know you... :)
Send me a message
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.
Today, I took my dogs to an empty park. While they were running around, I laid down in the grass to read a book. Someone thought I was a dead body and called the cops. The police and paramedics showed up. This is the second time it's happened. FML
Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML
Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, my mom and I were going to the store. I decided to stay in the car while she went in. In the car next to me, there was a dog in the driver's seat barking at me. Bored, I barked back at it until I realized there was someone in the passenger's seat watching me. FML
Today, I put on my hazard lights, pulled over to the side of the road, and stopped traffic on a busy road to rescue a black cat that had been hit by a car. With everyone watching, I got a towel and slowly approached the cat. It was a garbage bag. FML
Today, I fell asleep in a lecture. I laughed at something amusing in Dreamworld, but the laugh came out as a prolonged creepy groan in Lectureworld. I woke up to see everyone within a 5 meter radius staring at me. FML
Today, as I opened my diary to write a new entry, I noticed that every page had little side notes about what I had written. It had an extra long note on the page where I wrote about losing my virginity in great detail. All of the notes ended with "Love, Mom." FML
Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML
Today, I was taking a bath and out of boredom started making sheep noises. I then had a conversation with myself in farm animal noises. When I got out of the bath, I walked to my bedroom in my towel, passing the living room... where my little brother's soccer team burst out laughing. FML
Friday 22 May 2015