Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx

Search for a member

xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 May 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1027
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx : FMLs make me laugh so i look at them daily usually to laugh at other peoples misery or idiotic moments. Not on here to fight or argue because whether you win or lose an arguement on the internet, you're still a retard. :)

xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx's page activity

Visits<b>tadpole7</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 8:58pm<b>texasdad</b> - the 02/07/2011 at 9:13am<b>BoniTisma</b> - the 01/17/2011 at 11:41pm<b>ethereallight</b> - the 10/24/2010 at 5:52pm<b>iltby</b> - the 10/24/2010 at 9:12am<b>KarelessKitten</b> - the 10/24/2010 at 7:07am<b>noncomposmentis</b> - the 10/24/2010 at 4:08am<b>Malaci</b> - the 10/24/2010 at 12:56am<b>Sileny</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 9:46pm<b>Gameguy602</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 8:51pm<b>demarcusT</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 6:59pm<b>takeitandrun</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 6:51pm<b>mattman1994</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 6:30pm<b>Starfire22</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 6:15pm<b>anyone3</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 6:03pm<b>RunawayDinosaur</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 5:06pm<b>Kua_Mei</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 4:01pm<b>auto_da_fe</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 3:55pm

xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

#11989675
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59507) - you deserved it (3645)

On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17264) - you deserved it (41081)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was checking the Facebook event page to see who is attending the party I am having this weekend, since my parents are going out of town. 1 person has confirmed. My mom. FML

#8052181
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8548) - you deserved it (32957)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:52pm - misc - by fbcaught (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at 4am, I remembered that I had not studied for my Spanish exam. I panicked, jumped out of bed, and frantically began searching for my notebook. It wasn't until I destroyed my desk and woke up my roommate that I realized that I'm not enrolled in Spanish this semester. It was a nightmare. FML

#6537885
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31413) - you deserved it (8757)

On 11/30/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Stressmess - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML

#6265559
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (4413)

On 11/11/2009 at 10:05pm - misc - by DangerZone (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML

#6067303
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36688) - you deserved it (2152)

On 10/30/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by legotron (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71600) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71600) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I hurt my arm in a scooter accident, when my dad came to pick me up instead of taking me to the hospital like a normal dad, he took me directly home where he spent a hour shaving and taking a shower so he would "look nice" when he went to the hospital while I clutched my arm in pain. FML

#4222562
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44529) - you deserved it (3665)

On 08/02/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I hurt my arm in a scooter accident, when my dad came to pick me up instead of taking me to the hospital like a normal dad, he took me directly home where he spent a hour shaving and taking a shower so he would "look nice" when he went to the hospital while I clutched my arm in pain. FML

#4222562
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44529) - you deserved it (3665)

On 08/02/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone falls silent as my dad begins to pray for our meal. FML

#3882567
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46725) - you deserved it (4975)

On 07/19/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Churizmo - United States

Today, I was holding a yard sale. A man came up to me and asked if he could buy a pair of red and white sneakers that I'd found in my attic and had never worn. Five bucks later, he was walking away with what I now realize was the pair of shoes signed by Michael Jordan given to me by my uncle. FML

#3455804
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12515) - you deserved it (70643)

On 07/03/2009 at 2:30pm - misc - by capcha (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was camping. Me and this really cute girl were hitting it off real nice. It was the last night so we both headed over to my tent to have sex. I was just about to get it in when a raccoon ripped my tent causing the girl to scream and runaway. I got cockblocked by a raccoon. FML

#2729024
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70198) - you deserved it (8426)

On 06/08/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by Baggabbles123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML

#1751359
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69971) - you deserved it (41945)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:51pm - intimacy - by stpdaziandude (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was woken up by the sound of power tools at 6:30am. I stuck my head out my window and yelled at them to shut up. They didn't stop. I walked out the front door to find the bastard. It was firemen. They were sawing down the door of my neighbour's burning house. FML



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: