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xVictorx

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xVictorx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 March 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 665
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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xVictorx's favorite FMLs

Today, as my son carried the cage with live food for his pet lizards up the stairs, I heard the sound of 2,500 baby crickets escaping. FML

#4239314
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46304) - you deserved it (5885)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:29pm - animals - by cricketeer (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was going to surprise my boyfriend at his family birthday celebration with a $2,000 trip he's always wanted, Ireland. Right before my gift, he had opened his mother's gift, an envelope containing a plane ticket. Guess where it was going? FML

#3949240
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44619) - you deserved it (4458)

On 07/22/2009 at 4:11am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I babysat the most annoying and obnoxious kids for almost eight hours, when the parents assured me that they would only be gone about three or so hours. After constant calling and worrying, they finally showed up at 11:30, completely drunk. The mother paid me with three dollars and a banana. FML

#3935872
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57893) - you deserved it (3252)

On 07/21/2009 at 6:17pm - kids - by GabsAlot829 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She started panting harder and going, "AH, AH, AH..." and I thought she was about to come. Next thing I know, there's snot splattered all over my face and neck. Turns out it was a sneeze. FML

#1259503
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69834) - you deserved it (8086)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:47pm - intimacy - by snotface (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML

#1016784
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56616) - you deserved it (15329)

On 04/16/2009 at 10:38am - animals - by oops1234 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37101) - you deserved it (90414)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)



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